A REMUS STORY
by Xaviera Xylira
Summary: Guess what? It's about Remus. Yes. I am brilliant. (marauder days, R/OC, Peter is in it, Finished fic)
1. Birdie

A/N: Retyping this... AGAIN... anyway--- It's not romantic right away, and if it's sorta fluffy when the romance comes, then you'll just have to put up with it, won't you? I won't try to make it sickeningly sweet and I'll make Kamara (my made-up character) have some faults and won't try to make her too Mary Sue-ish. This thing has basically no plot, no mystery, nothing but my musings on Remus's teenage love life. Set in MWPP days and The Rat IS in the story because he WAS a part of the Marauders, whether we like it or not. I hate him, you hate him, EVERYONE hates him (with the exception of one person that I know whose name I will not mention because you'd all beat her senseless if she was found out), but I believe that his traitor-ism started AFTER Hogwarts, and he was actually a really... erm... _nice person _and _good friend _when he was in school (but if there's a few times when I speak unfavorably of him in my story, y'all won't mind, will you?). And I couldn't think of a better title. 

If you see the name Brielle in this story, ignore it and pretend that it says Kamara instead. I changed the name. 

Disclaimer: Everything you recognize isn't mine, it belongs to Ms. JK Rowling, because she is a genius and I am not (who wants to be perky and positive when you can be perfectly negative?). 

Dedications: Ice Angel, for introducing me to all your friends and rescuing me, The Dancing Mailbox for all your efforts to the "Help A Poor Tortured Wisconsinite Get to Canada" Fund (unfortunately, there were no proceeds whatsoever, so the trip is aborted), Eschew Obfuscation for reading my poetry and Beth the Fox for being crazy and emailing twice a day and running into walls and telling Echo to stuff it. AND TO ALL OF YOU FOR READING HARRY POTTER! (my class is so boring....)

They are in SIXTH YEAR! I changed it... it was fifth year before.....

A Remus Story

By: Xaviera Xylira

*

*

*

* * * 

* * 

*

Remus Lupin trudged into the Gryffindor Common Room with his three best friends and dumped his books on the nearest table. Sighing, he slumped down in a chair, James, Sirius and Peter following suit.

"Just because Snape's cauldron _happened_ to explode the same moment that I dropped the firework into it, Ominia loads US with a three-foot parchment essay on the Importance of Cauldron Compatibility for Potion Brewing! Unbelievable!" Sirius burst out.

"Well, you _could've_ been a bit more _discreet_ about it, Sirius," James began irritably. "Ominia was standing _right there _and she was staring _right at you _and you just---"

"Thanks, James," Sirius cut in loudly. Silence.

"You have to admit, though," Remus began after a moment, "it was pretty funny, seeing that stuff blow up in _Ominia's _face...." He grinned thinking about Ominia's ash-covered face, her beady black eyes widening in anger and surprise.

"And then she coughed up that smoke!" piped Peter.

"And then, Snape--- did you see Snape's _hair_?!" Sirius added, causing laughter to erupt from everyone. No, greasy hair and potions explosions did not form a pretty picture, Remus agreed mentally. 

Sixth years, prefects (with the exception of Peter, who couldn't make an A to save his life; and Sirius, who was decidedly "too much of a risk" to earn the prefect badge, courtesy of the Hogwarts staff.) and best friends, Remus, James, Sirius and Peter were hardly seen without each other--- or not pulling pranks, for that matter. This earned them the title "The Resident Master Pranksters of Hogwarts"; quite an honor, in their opinion. And their opinions were in highest regard among themselves. Though they did end up getting more detentions than Remus really wanted, he enjoyed every minute of it.

__

Well, almost every minute, he thought dejectedly as he pulled out his Potions book. Potions, which was nearly everyone's least favorite subject (save for the Slytherins), was taught by Professor Ominia, who also happened to be head of the Slytherin House, which made things considerably worse. And oh, how Ominia _hated _the Gryffindors....

__

But thank God today is Friday, Remus thought gratefully as he started a new paragraph on his essay. A second later, however, he was distracted: the portrait door opened, revealing a fifth year girl with dancing eyes. 

"Hiya Birdie," Sirius crowed, bouncing over to Kamara, who rolled her eyes and gave him an amused and slightly exasperated smile, a smile she reserved for only the Marauders. (A/N: I don't know why her nickname is Birdie. Ask the little voices in my head.)

"Sirius, get a life," she replied good-naturedly while making her way over to the table. Sirius followed, grinning broadly. Kamara was a friend of the Marauders, one of their closest. She was the quiet, studious type (when she wasn't around the raucous quartet, that is). She too was a prefect, and spent most of her time in the library if she wasn't with the Marauders. 

Quiet and studious, however, was only how she appeared. After hanging around her constantly, nagging her, bugging her and--- in Sirius's case ---hitting on her, the Marauders had finally gotten her to show her true nature--- and my, _what _a nature it was, too. 

But when she wasn't in the presence of the Marauders, she reverted back to her reserved and revered persona, a mask that she wore quite well. 

After that fateful day in third year, Kamara (or Birdie, as she was frequently referred to by Sirius) had remained close friends with Remus, James, Sirius and Peter.

Releasing a comical sigh, she set her books down and sank tiredly into a chair. After stretching once, she looked around the table with her dancing blue eyes, tried to hold back a smile (without succeeding), and said, "That was some prank today...."

This statement was immediately followed by loud laughter from the five. 

That was Kamara. She never took part in any pranks, no, much to Sirius's utter horror and bewilderment ("How can you survive without pulling pranks?!"), but she was always up for a laugh, and she truly enjoyed hanging around with the four guys, as far as Remus could tell. She was a great person to be friends with, she was always there for you when it counted, always the comforter. She had her own line of snappy comments that she let loose on James and Sirius whenever she decided that their egos were getting too big and she was always the first to point out quirks in their prank plans. 

In a sense, she and Remus where a lot alike. Both logical, and somewhat quiet, a bit more low-key than Sirius or James. 

But Kamara would take care to withdraw herself from other people unless it was the Marauders. It was only through persistence--- lots of persistence ---that she was friends with them now. She didn't really communicate with anyone else. Remus was cautious with who he talked to, he had to be, with his condition, but he didn't cover himself in an imaginary invisibility cloak and pretend not to exist. Kamara would talk to other people, of course, she wasn't shy, that was obvious; Remus had always wondered what made her so partial to solitude. 

It was Sirius who interrupted Remus's musings. 

"Hey, Birdie, what did we have in History of Magic again?" Sirius asked eagerly. Kamara sighed. Remus rolled his eyes, knowing that Sirius either knew what the assignment was or was just trying to get a rise out of Kamara to annoy her. Kamara probably knew this too, which is probably why it irritated her as much as it did. 

"Write a sixteen-inch essay on whatever Binns was talking about today, due Monday," Kamara supplied drowsily, yawning. 

"And what was Binns talking about?" Sirius asked, his eyes glittering. Oh, he'd just love it if Kamara started yelling. She glared instead. 

"Gee, Sirius. I forgot. Sorry," she retorted, her tone confirming that she wasn't in the least bit apologetic. Sirus pouted. James sniggered. Remus smirked. Peter grinned. "Now, if you'll excuse me, Sirius-lord-of-stupidity, I have to get to sleep," she mocked, yawning again. "'Night, guys." And she walked towards her dormitory stairs. 

"No, I won't excuse you!" Sirius shouted after her. 

"Well, too bad, I'm leaving anyway," and she continued walking.

"It's not even seven yet!" James called.

"Point?" she yelled back without looking. Remus smiled as he watched her trounce up the stairs, leaving her forgotten books on their table. She'd probably finished at the library, where she most likely was before she came in. 

Remus would have loved to tell Kamara about his "condition". She would understand, she--- no, she'd never understand _this_. He was still shocked that James and Sirius and Peter were his friends. Things hadn't changed one bit--- if anything, they had become better friends. They had found out in their first year, and last month, October, they had all helped Peter finally succeed in becoming an Animagus. This meant everything to Remus, not because they would be with him now on the full moon, but because they actually did that for him, because they were his friends, and they cared. 

James stuck his head up and looked around the Common Room. Apparently empty. Perfect. Dipping his head in once more, he began, "All right. The Marauders Meeting is now officially in order. Next prank victim?" 

"Severus Snape!" Sirius shouted, eyes glittering maliciously once more. The other three grinned knowingly. 

"Our favorite target.... Now, what shall we hit dear old Snapey with this time?" James asked, rubbing his hands together with anticipation. Immediately, Remus took out the Official Marauder's List, which named dozens upon dozens of possible pranks. Remus read off the most recent addition.

"We could give him a neon green afro and write 'I love James Potter' on---"

"Sirius!" James interrupted, reddening.

"What?" Sirius asked innocently. But his eyes decieved him, as they had many other times.

"Cross it off the List," James commanded. Remus smiled inwardly as he obediently scratched it out. He continued reading off pranks, stopping at various times to scratch off things that Sirius and James strongly objected to. They were just debating whether or not to curse Snape to sing "Treat Her Like A Lady" at breakfast when the portrait door opened again, revealing yet another fifth year girl. But this girl didn't look remotely happy. Quite the contrary, she looked livid with rage. Her normally sparkling emerald green eyes were narrowed and piercing, her hands were balled into fists, and her fiery red hair--- _no, wait, it's... it's blue!_ Remus corrected himself, taking the opportunity to join James, Sirius and Peter (who were suffocating themselves with laughter) on the floor. 

"POTTER!" The girl screeched, causing James to cover his ears. He stood up and tried to contain his laughter, allowing himself a cocky grin. 

"Did you want something, Lily dearest?" he asked her nonchalantly, biting his lip to keep the laughter down. She strode over to their table and paused clearly wanting to make an intimidating impression, which she succeeded at. Peter backed up and Sirius toned down his fit, biting his lip as well, shaking with supressed laughter. (A/N: Anyone know a synonym for laughter?)

"Change. It. BACK," she commanded through clenched teeth. James sniggered.

"But Lily dearest, you look so good in blue!" he smirked as the Marauders broke into laughter once more. Remus saw Lily take her wand out of her pocket, but he didn't have enough breath to shout a warning to James, who received a well-placed Silencing Charm, causing Sirius, Remus and Peter to howl with laughter even more. James was mouthing soundlessly (yet vehemently) to Lily. Remus supposed that if he could actually be heard, he would be yelling a few death threats right about now. 

"What's that, Jamsie-poo?" Lily teased, putting her hand up to her hair. James's mouthing increased--- he hated that nickname. "I can't quite hear you. Could you speak up a bit?" She began to laugh. "Oh, Potter, what have you gotten yourself into now?" And with that, she turned around and cackled her way up the dormitory stairs, probably going to find one of her dorm mates to turn her hair back to it's original red. 

James turned to the three Marauders, who had tears of mirth streaming down their faces. Peter silenced under his glare (still giggling silently, of course), but Remus and Sirius only laughed harder. Finally, after another five minutes of uncontrollable teasing and laughing at James, Remus finally removed the charm, against Sirius's wishes. He had thought it would've been fun to let James suffer a bit more. And in all honesty, Remus thought it would, but James would have let all hell loose if they had done that to him.

After having the charm removed from him, James treated them all to a nice long rant about how utterly useless Lily Evans was, how she was almost as low as a Slytherin (almost), how she had that hideous red hair and he was doing her a _favor_ by turning it blue. Remus was starting to think about putting the charm back on him. 

But then he sighed. A grateful, knowing sigh. No matter how insane his friends really were, he loved them for it.

And so, after deciding that tomorrow they'd make Evans and Snape to the tango at breakfast, the four friends grabbed James's invisibility cloak and headed to the kitchen for a mid-evening snack.

~*~

A/N: All right, I know, that was pretty boring, but IT DOES GET BETTER! And I'll upload sooner if I get at least three NICE reviews. Constructive criticism, NO FLAMES, the usual. 

~~~Xavi


	2. Stress is killer

A/N: Hi! I was so happy to get two reviews that I decided to go ahead and upload the next chapter. Now, let me clear something up: This isn't an l/j fanfic. I'll do one for them later. They won't get together in this, they'll just play pranks, and I'm not going to try and concentrate on them. I just figured like I'd throw that bit in there because I felt like it.... And Lily hates the Slytherins just as much as any other Gryffindors do.... All in all, Lily doesn't play a major part in this fic, at all. 

In truth, I'm not sure how long this thing will turn out to be, I've already got about five chapters written, but I dunno.... Oh, and guess what? There is a plot. Yep. It's not a very good one, but it's there. 

If you see the name Brielle in here, pretend that it says Kamara instead. I changed her name. 

Disclaimer: Not mine, sadly, though if they were up for auction, who's to say I wouldn't bid?

Dedications: Same as before.

Thank You: To my two reviewers (Beth and bluemeanies), you guys are AWESOME! (I'm psyched because I got reviews. ME. Reviews!) Bluemeanies: Brielle will fight with one (or more) characters, but not with Lily. She doesn't play that big a role in this story, sorry. (things might change, you never know)

~*~

Kamara closed the door behind her and sighed as one thought crossed her mind:

Stress was killer. 

Homework, Slytherin jerks (Snape and Malfoy in particular) and the Marauders kept her busy. The Marauders especially. She was always finding problems in their would-be genius plans. They kept her on her toes when she was around them, and there had been more than a few times when they'd pulled (more like jerked or dragged) her into one of their pranks. She had learned never to accept any food from Sirius, no matter if it looked completely innocent, to be prepared for flying glass and curses when James and Lily were in the same room together, that Remus was the best person to tell your problems to, and that Peter wasn't quite as boring as he looked (though he was just about as dim). 

She smiled as she thought of the Marauders. She didn't know what had compelled them to decide to become friends with her, but was she ever glad that they did. She couldn't really bring herself to make friends, and the Marauders were really the only ones she had ever had. At first, in the middle of third year, when James, Sirius, Remus and Peter had finally noticed her and began to pursue her, she had thought they were picking on her and being regular annoying boys. 

Then one night, with about a month to go until summer vacation, the four of them snuck up on Kamara when she was in the library and dragged her into an empty classroom, where they proceeded in giving her a detailed analysis of a prank that they needed her help on (she was notorious for her strength in Potions). Deciding that there really was no other option (What would they do if she had said no? Pestered her until she gave in.), Brielle agreed. 

And when the Slytherins all came to breakfast the next morning in assorted shades of green, the four boys and Brielle shared a private laugh; a laugh between friends. 

And friends they had stayed. She told them everything.

Well, almost everything.

They didn't know about her little "situation". They didn't need too, either. Why bother their thoughts with her problems? They didn't need to know anything about her parents. They didn't need to know anything at all.

But that didn't daunt their friendship. Though she wasn't a Marauder herself and she never played pranks unless she was either a) bribed; b) blackmailed; or c) Sirius had drugged her pumpkin juice (it had happened to her before), she gave them ideas and helped them along the way. She really did enjoy seeing their victims run around like chickens with their heads cut off. She enjoyed it even more seeing them get yelled at by Professor McGonagall, or, better still, having detention with Sinistra. 

Yes, the Marauders were such a fun group to be friends with. Sometimes Kamara couldn't even believe her good fortune. There was James: ringleader, mastermind, and founder of the Marauders, all-around prankster and good guy (most of the time); Sirius: mischievous, troublesome, one of those people that had an aura about him that seemed to say "I'm crazy, evil, and proud of it!". Kamara knew that when Sirius got that malicious glint in his eyes, it was best to back out of the room slowly. Remus, who was kind, compassionate, loyal, gentle, trustworthy, usually the one to stop Sirius from killing Snape and always there to lend a shoulder to cry on; and Peter, who, although he wasn't the brightest of the four, he was a good friend, and he held a fair grade in Herbology. 

Kamara had to admit, though, that Remus was her favorite of the four. He never asked too many questions, and always knew what type of manner was appropriate. Remus was one of those people that had a sort of air about him that gave off a sense of knowledge, and that intimidated a few people when he used it to it's full extent. If she ever chose to dislodge her secret, Remus would be the one to tell.

Not that she would reveal her secret any time soon. Probably never, with any luck. 

Just when Kamara was about to go to sleep, the dormitory door burst open, revealing a ruffled-looking, blue-haired Lily Evans, who appeared to be torn between maniac laughter and furious screams. 

Despite the fact that Lily and Kamara had been room mates since first year, Brielle didn't really know Lily or speak to her, other than a few "Hi, Hello and How are you?"'s every once in a while. For the most part, they got along, and they both considered the other a nice person. 

But back to the matter at hand.

"That Potter makes me so... so... mad!" cried Lily, apparently very angry. Then she began to howl with laughter, rolling on the floor and clutching her stomach, much to the bewilderment of Kamara, who was watching the scene with a mixture of curiousity and amusement. After calming down, Lily then smiled serenely at Kamara, took out her Charms book, found the counter-charm and changed her hair back to regular.

Kamara grinned to herself. _Another row with James, huh? That would have been interesting to see.... They always are.... _

And with those thoughts, Kamara drifted off to sleep. 

~*~

A/N: Sorry it's so short. Preview for next chapter: It'll be about as short as this one (I'm SORRY!) but the... er... prank will go down at breakfast (see first chapter), Brielle will have some musings about just what Remus is hiding, and we'll get a POV from Sirius. Remember, the more reviews I get, the sooner the next chapter gets up! 


	3. Into the Mind of Sirius (oh lordy)

A/N: *smile* I got reviews! I love you guys! All right, um... Well, no one asked any questions so.... nothing to answer! If I don't upload everyday, you won't miss me, will you? Because things are starting to get busy.... And I'm wondering, what do you WANT to happen? I mean, I have it pretty much planned, but.... And what do you think of Kamara? I haven't had much time to develop her as a character. And did you find my plot line in Chapter two? It's there, just a little one, for Kamara. She has a "situation". I'm not telling, but it's a family thing, I'll give you that much. You'll have to wait until later chapters. 

If you see the name Brielle in this chapter, pretend that it says Kamara. I changed the names. 

Disclaimer: Anything you recognize isn't mine. 

Dedications: See chap. 1

Thank you: All my reviewers this last time: Lily Evens (thanks, I appreciate that!), Phaedra (I don't think there's enough Remus stories out there, don't you? And thanks for the compliment), Kame (glad to hear you can relate to Brielle!) and G*Ness (honestly, I didn't actually think you'd review mine... thanks a lot.... and write more on yours soon). THANK YOU SOOOO MUCH!!! 

~*~

__

Chapter Three

~*~

After nearly choking with shock on her orange juice at breakfast the next morning, Kamara gaped at Remus, Sirius, James and Peter, all of whom were laughing madly. 

"You did that, didn't you?" she asked them incredulously. Sirius nodded though his hysterics, but he hadn't needed to. Kamara, of course, knew that they had been responsible. They always were. She looked down the table at Lily, who, at this point, was glaring murderously at the Marauders. Brielle then glanced at Snape, who was conversing quietly with his fellow Slytherins, no doubt coming up with a revengeful plot. Suddenly, Lily pushed back her chair and took swift strides to where James was sitting. 

Kamara tried to warn him. Really, she did. But she was glad that he had been too busy laughing his head off to listen when Lily had brought her hand down to his cheek with what must have been a very painful blow. Lily then gave a very satisfied smirk and glided triumphantly out of the Great Hall, leaving James to clutch his reddening cheek and the remaining Marauders and Kamara to howl with mirth. 

(A/N: I don't know why I put that little bit in there. I felt like it, okay? Think of it as a Kodak moment.... If you don't know what this part is about, go back to the very end of chapter one. The Marauders decided on a small prank.... *evil grin*)

~*~ 

(A/N: Yeah, one right after another. Anyway, I have no clue as to any lunar data and facts, and I've always wondered why Remus was always gone for a week if the full moon was only supposed to last one night. So, for my convenience, the full moon will last three days. If anyone strongly disagrees and thinks I should change it, leave a review.) 

"Where's Remus?" Kamara asked James and Sirius (Peter had a Potions detention) as she entered the Common Room one Friday night a week later. "I haven't seen him since yesterday." Their heads shot up.

"His uncle died," explained Sirius, just as James said---

"His cousin's sick." Kamara raised one skeptical eyebrow. James and Sirius looked at each other frantically. 

"What he said," they said simultaneously. Sirius made a noise of agitation and muttered some profanity while James explained.

"He's visiting his sick cousin who's uncle died." Kamara frowned at him; James was lying, she could always tell when he did. He had that fake smile on his face and his eyes were unblinking, as though trying to convince everyone that he was innocent. Something was up, and just as Kamara was about to contradict James, Sirius tactfully changed the subject. 

"Why are you so interested in finding Remmie anyway?" he asked slyly. "Maybe you want our Remus to accompany you for some late-night star-gazing in the Astronomy tower, hmmm?" Sirius asked again, raising his eyebrows suggestively. Kamara glared. 

"Sirius, I don't even want to know what goes on in that sick little mind of yours." Sirius grinned. 

"Why do you want to see Remus?" James injected, knowing that if Sirius pushed Kamara far enough, she would blow. 

"Jesus, is it a crime if I want to talk to him about something?" she asked, getting defensive. 

"Depends on what you wanted to talk to him about," Sirius teased. "Is Kamawa getting a wittle wonesome?" he asked in baby tone. 

"I just need help with my Defense Against the Dark Arts homework, all right? Bugger off," she snapped. (A/N: From now on, I'm going to refer to Defense Against the Dark Arts as DADA because I'm too lazy to type it all out.) 

"Well, why didn't you say so?" James asked. "You don't need Remus for that! We can help you!" He pointed to himself and Sirius. They grinned broadly. 

"Oh no," Kamara started, a sense of foreboding creeping into her. "No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I remember the _last _time you two helped me with my homework," she said, shuddering. The table still had the scorch marks. James and Sirius grinned even wider, apparently very pleased with themselves. Brielle sighed. "When will Remus be back?" 

"Couple days," said James with a shrug. Just then, Peter entered the Common Room, looking quite fed up and dirty. 

"Hi Peter," Kamara greeted him. He looked up at her, then around at James and Sirius, and broke into a grin. Then he looked up at the clock above the fireplace and said to James and Sirius:

"We should probably go." James and Sirius looked at the clock as well before nodding and standing up. 

"What---" Kamara began, but Sirius cut her off.

"Prank. Snape's gonna get a dumped on his head that'll make him flash different shades of pink and give him hair like Dumbledore. We're gonna get a picture," he explained with a wide grin. Kamara nodded knowingly. 

"I see. Well, make sure you give him a purple nose, just for me," she said as James threw the invisibility cloak over his two other companions. 

"Will do," James's voice obliged before he slipped out of the portrait door with Sirius, leaving Brielle alone. She sighed again and looked into the fire. 

She was really beginning to worry about Remus. Every month he was gone somewhere, and he came back looking completely drained. And James and Sirius couldn't fool her; she knew them too well. She wasn't an idiot. They were hiding something.

She just wished she knew what it was.

~*~ 

Sirius sighed mentally as he walked along the abandoned corridor with James and Peter, heading towards the Whomping Willow. Honestly, was he the _only _competent mind around here? It was so bloody OBVIOUS that Remus and Kamara liked each other. But even _they_ didn't know it! The way Remus gazes at her in class... Kamara always going out of her way to saw hello.... It was sickening. Sirius wished they would just admit it to themselves and to each other so that he didn't have to put up with it anymore.

He gave another mental sigh. If they did _that_, then they'd be all over each other.

Then he smiled. 

That was _exactly_ the way he wanted it.

~*~

A/N: I know, that was pathetically short. But maybe if I get more reviews this time then I'll make the next chapter longer. (hint, hint.) Constructive criticism only, though I haven't had any flames yet. (but you won't be able to get rid of me with flames, so you'd be wasting your time if you bothered.) But to all those who DID review, I am eternally grateful! 


	4. Head Over Heels

****

READ THE AUTHOR'S NOTE!

A/N: If anyone has any questions, suggestions, compliments or CONSTRUCTIVE criticism, leave a review. Please excuse any spelling, grammar or punctuation errors; I'm not perfect (I know, so hard to believe, isn't it?). After this chapter, I don't know how soon the fifth will be up, seeming as I haven't written that one yet, and things are getting REALLY busy right now. But, you know my motto: **The more reviews I get**, the longer my chapter are, and the sooner they get posted. **And if anyone wants to be emailed when I update, leave a review and your email addy and TELL ME that you want me to email you. **

_And in case you haven't noticed, I changed Brielle's name to Kamara, which means "like the moon". I think it just fit with the story more. Her nickname's still Birdie, though. I'm not going to change it again, and I'm sorry if you don't like the name, but you'll live. _

Disclaimer: JKR's creation, not mine. All I own is an easy-bake oven and a few ancient cans of soup. 

Dedications: See first chapter (yes, Beth, you're still in the dedication list). 

Thank you: Beth the Fox, for your two reviews. Hurry up and update your story. And also to Torquemada: I SO know what you mean. Those type of fics don't interest me, either, seeming as it's so unprobable it's absurd. I'm glad you like this, I'm working hard to make it interesting, tell me, how am I doing? Is it going too slow? 

~*~

__

Chapter Four

~*~

Coming into the Common Room two days later, Remus was ready to collapse from exhaustion. It wasn't exactly a pleasant experience he went through every full moon. However, he restrained himself. Otherwise, there would be a lot of explaining to do. 

Still, the last three days had been some of the best he'd ever had. It was almost overwhelming, to think that three people would do that just for him, just because they wanted to be with him on the full moon, to make things easier for him. 

And they'd had a _blast. _

"Remus!" a familiar voice called out. Remus turned his head towards the fireplace. 

"Kam," he greeted her, smiling. She smiled back and waved him over. Reluctantly he obliged--- even though it was past noon, he was really just wanting to get into bed and go to sleep. Nonetheless, he took a seat on the couch opposite of Kamara. Her face changed from friendly to concerned when she saw him up close. 

"Remus, are you all right?" she asked softly. She eyed him wearily. "You don't look too well...." Panic was building in Remus's mind. 

"Just tired, I guess," he said quickly. _Well, it's the truth, _he thought defensively. 

"I see...." She shrugged. I was going to ask you for help with my DADA homework last night, but you still weren't back, so I was forced to ask _Sirius _for help," she reported, spitting out the name "Sirius" as though it were some vile swear. Remus smiled. He loved it when Kamara complained about Sirius. Especially if Sirius _heard_ Kamara complaining about him--- which would result in Sirius's crazy revenge antics and _a lot _of screaming on Kamara's part. "And dear old _Sirius_ thought that the best way to learn something would be to actually use the DADA classroom," she sniffed in irritation, "Needless to say, Filch was less than pleased." 

By this time, Remus was laughing heartily, imagining Sirius trying (without succeeding) to explain to Filch, the caretaker, just exactly what he was doing hexing objects in the DADA classroom at night. Because that's what they were studying--- how to block jinxed and hexed objects from crossing their paths. 

"Remind me never to go to Sirius for help with homework ever again," she added, grinning, happy that she had made Remus laugh. "He doesn't know left from right." 

Remus smiled at Kamara. He really was lucky to have a friend like her. She was the sweetest person he knew--- always the first to lend a hand, giving up her time to help someone else (as long as they were one of the Marauders).... Even the time that Sirius was having a lot of trouble hooking up with that sixth year Ravenclaw last year, Kamara was there to give him a few pointers. She was so happy that Sirius got his girlfriend (not the Ravenclaw he wanted, but someone he thought was even better) that she didn't even yell at him when he slipped a cockroach cluster into her dessert that night. It didn't work out between Sirius and his new-found love, but he didn't seem to mind much--- a few days after the break up, he was with someone new. Remus recalled Kamara calling it "a typical, Sirius-thing to do" before rolling her eyes and walking up to her dorm, muttering about how much Sirius owed her for those tips. 

Remus was just about to ask Kamara what prnaks he'd missed when Sirius, James and Peter burst through the portrait door, laughing hysterically. Seeing Remus, they tromped over to him. 

"Moony, old chap!" Sirius exclaimed, plopping down next to him on the couch. James followed, grinning broadly, then Peter. "How ya been, mate?" Sirius continued with a fake Australian accent. Remus decided that now would be a good time to excuse himself--- if he didn't leave soon, he wouldn't be able to later. Sirius would drag him into something illegal that wouldn't benefit his health or sanity at all....

"I'll think I'll just get some rest now.... It's been a long week." The other Marauders exchanged knowing looks and nodded. 

"See you later then," James called out as Remus headed towards the stairs. Remus gave a half-hearted smile before trudging up the stair case. 

~*~

Kamara stared after Remus, mentally sighing. There was something wrong.... She'd known it for a while now....

James, as if sensing her thoughts, interrupted them. 

"So, Kam," he started, and Kamara looked at him expectantly. "Is there anything you'd like to share with the class?" She raised an eyebrow. 

"James, what are you ta---"

"Aw, c'mon, Birdie," Sirius interrupted. "Admit it. You like Remmie." 

"Well of course I like Remus, he's my friend," she said casually, evading the answer to the real question that Sirius asked. 

"No, you LIKE HIM like him," said Peter, nodding in emphasis. Kamara sighed out loud. She had expected that much. After all, they _were_ male.

"No, I don't, he's just my friend, and that's all he'll ever be. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a Runes paper to finish." And with that, she got up, grabbed her book bag, and walked calmly out of the portrait hole, on her way to the library. 

~*~ 

"She's head over heels," said Sirius immediately after Kamara had left. Peter nodded. 

"I don't know.... She seems pretty sure of herself...." 

"Yeah, but Prongs, you always "seem pretty sure of yourself" when ever you say that you hate Evans, but we all know how you _really_ feel," Sirius replied. James glared, and Sirius smiled innocently (or tried to). James was so predictable. Peter changed the subject, sensing James's temper rising. 

"Last night was a lot of fun, don't you think?" The trio smiled, proud of themselves. For the very first time, they had successfully managed to transform into their Animagi selves, and they'd had the night of their lives. Who knew that there were so many hidden places around Hogsmeade and Hogwarts? 

And Remus was looking considerably better than he usually did after the full moon. That, for the three of them, was what mattered. No one deserved to be a werewolf. Well, maybe Snape or Malfoy, but certainly not Remus. People like Remus deserved only the best, and he couldn't ask for better friends. 

Friends until the very end, no matter what happens, no matter how much they changed, no matter what their destiny held in store, they'd always be friends. 

~*~

A/N: Well, what do you think? It made me kind of sad to write that last sentence because of what actually happens, but then again, I'm just sentimental like that. Now, please, please, please, please, PLEASE review! Or it might be a little longer before I post again.... 

Preview for next chapter: I'm not sure, because I haven't written it yet, but there'll be some more conflict, Kamara will start to have some suspicions about Remus being a werewolf, I _think _James _might_ have a POV, Remus will notice Kamara acting a little weird.... Oh, don't worry, Kamara never thinks of deserting Remus, no, she's got her own "family problems", remember? Yeah, Beth, you were right, Kamara's dad "haunting" her is just a figure of speech. Kamara's problems come after she discovers that Remus is a werewolf, which won't be until most likely chapter six, maybe chapter five if I feel like making it really long, but I don't think that'll happen. 

Out of spur of the moment decision, I think I just might abandon this fic for a little while, since I'm getting kind of busy, and since no one but Beth seems to have a real interest in it. Tell ya what, if I get just FIVE reviews, five measly little reviews, I'll continue just as soon as I can. Otherwise, I'll take a break. 


	5. His Eyes

A/N: I am truly disappointed in my writing. I can do so much better than this, and I'm not really putting a lot of effort into it. The idea is good, but my skills need work, and I need to proofread this more.... Kamara, I feel, needs to be more developed, I don't think she's grown enough as a character. I'm anxious to get some action in here, because I feel that the story may be losing it's appeal, but I wanted to get you to know Kamara. I don't know.... What do you think? Should I just drop the story? Or should I just stick it out and go with it? Look, if you guys want more, then I'll write, and I'll try to make it appealing.... I really feel that there needs to be some more action, so sometime I'll bring in (Lucius) Malfoy and Snape so that I can beat up on them.... I just feel like I need some characters to toy with.... Sorry if I come off as a homicidal maniac..... Beth would be proud.... So would Mel... and Ice.... and the Dancing Mailbox.... So go throw me a party, and then we'll sue Bill Gates and continue our plans for world domination.

Also, I realized that this is the year when James saves Snape from the Whomping Willow on the full moon.... For those of you who were wondering, that already happened. *nods* Yeah, in something like September, simply because I don't want to have to worry about it. 

Oh, and one more thing, if you read the original version of chapter two, you'll find something like "she didn't need her father haunting anyone else" somewhere in there. Well, forget about it, it's been revised; now there's a new plan for Kamara's family problem! And it's a better one! Not telling what it is though, sorry Beth, I know you'll ask.... 

Disclaimer: JKR and whoever else own everything that you recognize. Me? All I own is echo, my mental voice and so-called muse, but he, of course, objects to my claiming of him, and it's not as if I can actually control him or anything, so--- (echo: YOU. DO. NOT. OWN. ME. We have a CONTRACT! IT SHALL NOT BE BROKEN!) You wanna know how many times a day I have to tell him to shut up? 

Dedications: See first chapter (with one new addition, also dedicated to Yenny, just because I feel like it). 

Thank You to:

biblehermione--- That did it! You were my fifth review! You made me so HAPPY! *ahem* carrying on....

Lily Evans--- I hope you like this. I'm going to start putting more effort into it and HOPEFULLY somewhere along the way the plot that's supposed to be here will reappear. (btw, would you mind terribly signing in next time you review? Because there's FOUR Lily Evans on this site, and I'm wondering which one you are. But if it's too much trouble, then never mind.)

Yenny--- Thanks so much for reading it! Now, HOW many days until Lord of the Rings?

Beth--- Hurry up with your chapter, I'm really looking forward to seeing echo get slapped around. (And for all of you who haven't read The Dead That Walk and/or The Dead That Wander, then get your arse's over to Beth's stories and read them! There, see, Beth, I did you a favor. Now go write. _After_ you review my story.)

Sorry that took so long! Now, on with the story!

~*~ 

__

Chapter Five

~*~

"So, who's staying for Christmas with me?" Sirius chirped over breakfast one cool December morning. 

"I am," James said, looking up from his plate. 

"Not me, I'm going home," Peter confirmed, his tone making it clear that he wouldn't want to be anywhere else. 

"I'm going home too," said Remus, and he didn't need to explain why to the boys. Kamara noticed their reserved looks and narrowed her eyes. _What are they hiding? _

Seeing Kamara's expression, James tactfully changed the subject. Swinging his arm around Kamara's shoulders, he said: 

"Well, lucky you, Kam, you get to spend the holiday with us!" And he gave her a wide grin. The same grin he'd given her various times during the past few months. She let it go, for now, and smiled wryly at him. 

"James, hun," she began, picking up his sleeve and removing it from her shoulders as if he had some life-threatening, contagious disease, "Christmas is a time for family." James and Sirius looked crestfallen. "So, of course, I'll be staying here," she added with a grin to rival James's new one. _As if I would go home_, she thought sullenly. Sirius rubbed his hands together with something that could only be described as gleeful malice. 

"Oh, Birdie, we're gonna have so much fun this Christmas," he proclaimed, and Kamara stared at him as though he had just announced that he had just been accepted into the insane ward of St. Mungo's (which she wouldn't exactly have been surprised at). Just as Kamara was about to reply, however, a certain "slimy git" (as often referred to by the Marauders) and one "vampire wanna-be" (another of the Marauder's brilliant and not-so-secret nicknames) entered, flanked by Crabbe and Goyle ("two over-sized gorillas that make a quintaped look like a bunny rabbit" in the words of the forever-serious Marauders), their expressions giving off a bitter and utter loathing. 

"Well, if it isn't Potter, Black, Lupin and Pettigrew," sneered Malfoy, his voice not masking the animosity that he was delivering.

"Well, if it isn't our four FAVORITE victims," James said, smiling sardonically at them. 

"Say, how do you boys like the new Common Room decor?" Sirius asked, referring to a recent prank (they had painted the Slytherin Common Room red and gold). 

"Yes, we were up _all night _on it," Remus grinned, watching the reactions from the four Slytherins, who looked all but amused. 

"You better watch yourselves," Snape threatened. "This won't go by without---" 

"Yes, yes, all very fine indeed, Snapey," James interrupted, yawning, making it painfully obvious that he was undaunted by Snape's warning. "But I'm afraid it'll have to wait, it's Saturday, you know, things to do, places to go...." He gave one last, triumphant smirk before standing up, the other three Marauders and Kamara standing up with him. 

Unfortunately for her, Malfoy noticed Kamara. 

"And who's this? Another mudblood? Good Lord, when will it end...?" The five Gryffindors spun around. 

"What did you just call her?" Sirius hissed, taking out his wand. Remus put a hand on his shoulder, but glared at Malfoy. 

"A bit rich, coming from you, Malfoy, when taken into consideration who _you_ hang around with," Remus shot back. 

"Well, at least I have _class_ when it comes to my peers, I don't just prance around with any old trash like---" But Malfoy's insult was soon cut off by the two curses issued from James and Sirius's wands. After nodding satisfyingly, the five friends smiled and walked out of the Great Hall, leaving a disgruntled Snape and two trollish hybrids puzzling over the unconscious vampire wanna-be. 

~*~

"They're infuriating!" Sirius huffed as the five were walking towards the Gryffindor Common Room.

"They were just acting like Snape and Malfoy. It's not as if I've never been called that before," Kamara reasoned. 

"But Kam, that's not the point," James said. "They can't just go around calling people mudbloods! It's just... just..."

"Disrespectful?" Peter offered. (A/N: Ha, bet you thought I'd forgot about him, didn't you?)

"Exactly," James agreed. 

"Might I point out that the things your four do aren't always respectful?" Kamara objected. 

"Why are you sticking up for them?!" Sirius exclaimed. 

"I am NOT sticking up for those Slytherin imbeciles," Kamara said heatedly. "I just don't want you to get into any more trouble than you usually do." Sirius broke into a grin. 

"Aw, Kammie cares about us!" Kamara rolled her eyes and turned to Remus. 

"Honestly, how do you put up with him?" Remus smiled.

"A lot of practice; you get used to him." 

By now, they had reached the portrait of the Fat Lady. Giving her the password ("Audentia") and entering, James gave the all-too-familiar announcement. 

"You know, I think we owe Snape and Malfoy another of our lovely little jokes," he remarked, smiling fondly at his four comrades. Kamara smiled at him, a weird sort of smile, Remus noticed, like there was something she wasn't telling them, and shook her head. 

"Do you ever stop, James? Well, if you're going to play another prank, I suggest using the Cresco Cretum spell; it makes either the ears or the nose bigger, I can't remember which." James nodded thoughtfully and Sirius got that familiar gleam back in his eyes. "Now, I have to go write a letter, excuse me." James, Sirius and Peter nodded absently; they were already consumed in planning their next prank. Remus, however, watched Kamara thoughtfully as she slowly made her way up to her dormitory. 

Remus couldn't quite put his finger on it, but there was definitely something wrong. 

Sighing, he placed his attention back on the matter at hand, but only after making a mental note to ask Kamara what was wrong later. 

Because friends don't let friends drown themselves in sadness. 

~*~

Kamara watched, miserable, as her tawny owl flew out the window of the owlery sometime later that night. The letter simply explained to her family that she would be staying at Hogwarts for Christmas, she hoped they were doing well, and she'd see them in the summer. 

There really wasn't much else she could tell them. 

In an attempt to forget about those thoughts, she let her mind stray to the Marauders. It had made her happy when they'd come to her defense, but she'd immediately felt guilty afterwards, when she realized that they could get in trouble for it, and she didn't want to be to blame. 

She had to admit, though, that Remus handled the situation rather admirably. 

That was what she liked about Remus. He never overreacted. Always cool-headed, always logical. 

Someone who could keep secrets. 

Secrets. Yes, that was a bit of an issue. She had a feeling, a very strong feeling, that whatever those four were hiding had something to do with Remus. 

She was sure of it. 

Remus had a secret, she could tell, because she had one too. And by the looks of it, Remus wasn't too happy about his. She could tell by the look in his eyes every time a certain word was said, or something reminded him of his secret. 

Remus's eyes could tell a lot of things. 

Sometimes, Kamara almost forgot about her secret, her situation. Oh, those blissful times when she did....

They were usually with the Marauders. 

In a way, Kamara felt that Remus knew her better than anyone else; regardless of how little he _did _know. There were times when he had a sadness that reflected in his eyes; a sadness so deep that it penetrated his very soul. 

His eyes. 

Kamara knew that sadness, she knew it very well. 

She only hoped that Remus's sadness would go away. 

Because whatever caused it, he didn't deserve. 

~*~ 

A/N: Well, that was a bit weird. 

Preview for next chapter: Christmas break, we WILL get a POV from James (unless things change, which may happen), Kamara will start suspecting he's a werewolf, and.... uh.... I dunno what else. 

I hoped you liked the Slytherin addition. Malfoy and Snape will play a little bit of a bigger role in the future, however, if things go as planned. I also plan on having a scene in an actual CLASSROOM. Absolutely thrilling, isn't it?

Hope y'all liked this, and PLEASE, review if you did. 


	6. Eavesdropping

A/N: Okay, so, I like the way Kamara turned out last chapter in the end, sort of, but now I think Remus needs some work. I'm unintentionally cutting him out of conversations and I really shouldn't, because the story IS about him. I have to work on that....

Disclaimer: I own absolutely, positively, EVERY SINGLE LITTLE THING YOU SEE ON THE SCREEN! WHOOPEE! ahem... too much sugar. Excuse the insanity, though it's very common, I suppose you'll just have to get used to it. (and for all you obsessive law freaks out there, I own NOTHING, so don't sue me, because I REALLY can't afford it.)

Dedications: Lemme refresh your memory: Ice Angel (Echo Chik), Eschew Obfuscation, The Dancing Mailbox, Beth the Fox (go read her stories!) and Yenny. 

Thank You: 

Beth the Fox--- Mwahahahahahahaha!!!! Sorry. Had to do that. Echo made me. (echo: you repulse me.) THANKS FOR THE REVIEW!!! And good luck with the diabolical toasters. They can be little pests, they can. And WHEN will the fourth chapter be up? (I'm a demanding little demon, aren't I?) 

G*Ness--- Did you get my review on your other story? I don't know WHEN I'll be able to read it again, I'm lucky I even get a chance to write this. I'm glad to hear that you enjoyed the Slytherin addition. Snape and Malfoy were thrown in last chapter simply because I felt the story needed more action. They'll get under Kamara's skin in later chapters, though. Somehow, Malfoy's gonna find out what her "secret" is. la dee da dee da.... And I do hope that my writing is improving. 

Echo Chik--- Ice, girl! I'd love to tell ya what happens, hun, but ya know.... well, lemme THINK ABOUT IT. I'll tell ya once you're not banned from your comp anymore (parents can be so cruel....). Maybe. But I really think that I should make you beg more, since I had to grovel too. *evil grin* Yes, I'd like that.... 

Yenny--- What is your name going to be in the credits thingie? Cuz I might be going to see the movie. Stress on might. (and ask Beth to tell ya about my quitting thing) And thanks SO MUCH for reviewing and reading, I know it might be a little confusing considering you haven't actually read the books, but oh well.... 

THISTLE--- No, Kamara's family isn't ghosts or vampires, sorry (I thought I edited that part out of the story....). It was just a figure of speech. I can't really say much, but let me put it this way: Kamara's family isn't all that it seems to be, and she knows it, but she's keeping it a secret. A very painful secret. And I'm SO happy to hear that you don't think she's a Mary Sue! I was beginning to wonder. 

~*~ 

__

Chapter Six

~*~

Kamara looked out the window of her dormitory and sighed. There was a white sheet a snow on the ground, flakes were falling, icicles were hanging from the ledges and roofs, and children were playing precariously in what they obviously thought was heaven (she noticed with amusement that two of those children were James and Sirius). 

So what, you may ask, is a pretty girl like Kamara doing inside on such a lovely day?

Nothing, really, would be a simple way to put it. 

With two says till Christmas and all her shopping done and homework completed, Kamara was perfectly content to sit on the window seat and stare out the window without a care in the world. 

It was something she didn't get to do that often. 

Kamara pulled her knees up to her chest and unconsciously twirled a strand of her dark hair. 

Remus. 

All through the holiday, thoughts of Remus had been lurking in the corner of her mind. He had seemed neither happy nor sad to be going home when James, Sirius and herself had seen him and Peter off a few days ago. He seemed only resolved. 

And all through the holiday, that damned secret had been hovering in the back of Kamara's head. It seemed now that _everything _had to do with what they were hiding. Whenever they shared a glance, a knowing look, or James got that smile on his face, or Sirius looked nervous, or anything. It was safe to say that Kamara was fed up and tired of all their excuses. 

She wanted to know the _truth._

Didn't they trust her? Didn't they? What kind of secret was so bloody important and crucial that she couldn't be let in on? 

A wave of guilt washed over her.

She hadn't been exactly truthful with them, either. She sighed again, this time with suppressed sadness. It was fair, she supposed. 

But still.... 

Deciding that she'd rather not dwell on it right this moment, Kamara grabbed _Hogwarts: A History _from her bedside table and proceeded down to the Common Room, only to be intercepted by James and Sirius a few moments later. 

"Kam, c'mon, it's great outside, what are you doing in here?" Sirius rushed, his eyes alight with mischief, cheeks flushed from the cold (he and James had just gotten in from their previous snowball fight). They had come back up to see if Kamara was awake yet; they wanted to invite her to the snowball war that they had started. 

After a good five minutes of pestering and another five minutes of grumbling and protests, Kamara was pushed down the deserted Hogwarts corridors in her winter wear, out the door, and was promptly pelted with a crisp snowball. Smiling, she bent down and gathered some snow up in her own hands. 

Unfortunately for James and Sirius, they didn't know she had brought her wand.

Nor did they know that she knew a good few snowball hexes. 

~*~ 

"Remus, dear, come down for dinner," called Mrs. Lupin from the kitchen. Remus glanced up from his homework in his room. Sighing, he set down his quill and slumped down the stairs. His father was already seated at the table, reading the _Daily Prophet_. Remus slipped into his chair quietly as his mother placed a plate of Christmas turkey in front of him. They were celebrating Christmas that night as December 25th would be a full moon. That was why Remus had been more subdued. 

"How's school, dear? And James and Sirius and Peter? And the girl--- what was her name? Oh, Kamara! How are they all?" Mrs. Lupin asked her son brightly as they began to eat. Larissa Lupin, Remus's mother, was a rosy sort of witch, with a smile that could light up a room and what seemed to Remus, sometimes, as an overly optimistic attitude. Remus smiled slightly as he thought of his friends. 

"They're great. Sirius and James have nearly broken the record for most detentions ever received; all they need is forty-six more." Mrs. Lupin chuckled lightly. 

Conversation was strained after that. Every once in a while, Remus would chance a glance at his father, who seemed oddly reserved tonight, unlike his usual self. Remus caught his mother glancing fretfully at him a few times as well. Mr. Lupin was rather tall and kind of thin. He worked for the Ministry of Magic in the Magical Mysteries division (A/N: I can't remember what this division is precisely called, and I'm too lazy to go look it up. Well, you'll live.). His eyes usually shone with something like childish wisdom and excitement, but tonight they were dull. 

Later that night, after all his gifts were unwrapped and it was well past the hour he was supposed to be asleep, Remus sat hunched over the desk in his room, attempting a few more sentences on his History of Magic essay before calling it a night. Snuffing out the candle, Remus got out of his chair and walked across the room towards his bed. He had just made himself comfortable when his ears, trained by all those nights as an animal, picked up the sound of his parents' voices. 

"Has she told them?" came his mother's apprehensive voice, hushed though it was. After a mental five-second debate, Remus crept out of his room and tip-toed down the stairs as far as he dared to get a better idea of what they were talking about. 

"I seriously doubt it, Larissa. He would have said something, or at least acted a little differently." His father sounded both exhausted and troubled. 

"Why is it just in the news now? It was eight years ago...." _What happened eight years ago?_

"Because before they just considered it an accident; now they think it was... _him_." Remus's father spat out that last word as though it were a swear that would make even the dirt back up. "Now that he's attacking more, and we're seeing his pattern, it's becoming more and more obvious that those 'accidents' a few years ago may not really have been 'accidents' at all," Mr. Lupin said bitterly. 

"Alex... that poor girl..." Mrs. Lupin's voice was choked with sympathy. _What poor girl?_

"I know, Larissa, I know," Mr. Lupin comforted his wife, pulling her towards him. "And her parents were two of the nicest people I'd ever met...." _Who's parents? What happened?_

But it appeared that that would be all that Remus would get out of his parents for the night, and he slowly crept back up the stairs to his room, trying very hard to figure out just what, exactly, was going on. 

But for all his knowledge, he didn't have a clue. 

~*~

December 25th was a festive day at Hogwarts. The Great Hall was decorated with tall, gorgeous Christmas trees that stood proudly, glittering and sparkling. It seemed that the very walls of the castle were singing, and Kamara almost forgot what it was like to be home with her family for Christmas. 

Almost.

Kamara sat at the Gryffindor table with James and Sirius and a few other younger Gryffindors, eating and laughing joyously. There were but two people from Hufflepuff and four each from Ravenclaw and Slytherin and no one from any of the houses presented a desire to clash with the others. 

There was a certain air of contentment surrounding the three friends; though not quite the same as when Remus and Peter were there but happy nonetheless. 

It was the morning after that brought the peaceful and lovely mood to an abrupt halt. 

Kamara had awaken fairly early and had just reached the Common Room when a sudden shout from the sixth year boys' dormitory attracted her attention. Curious, Kamara ascended the stairs leading to the dorm--- it wouldn't be the first time she had visited it; the four boys were the only sixth year Gryffindor boys, and they had dragged her up to their dorm more than once to show her some incredible new illegal toy or sometimes out of the sheer want to irritate her (she never liked going into their dorm--- it smelled like unwashed clothes and something undeniably male). 

Just as she was about to enter the room (she had learned long ago that knocking was pointless--- they either never heard it or acted as if they didn't), however, she froze, listening to James's voice.

"Sirius, listen, Remus can't tell her. You remember how much it hurt him to actually admit it to us?"

"Yeah, but James, Kam would understand," Sirius argued. Kamara tensed as she heard her name and strained her ears further. "She's been friends with us for, what, two years now? Three? We can trust her." 

So they were talking about the secret.

"I don't doubt that we can trust her, Sirius," James sounded indignant, "but it's Remus's decision! We have no right to tell her if he doesn't---"

"But he'll never tell her!" There was a pause.

"Sirius," James began quietly, and Kamara wished she had her wand so that she could perform a hearing charm, "Remus will tell her in time. It may be a long while, I'm willing to say as far as years, and you know how Remus feels about it. But it has to be his decision." 

"Fine, but---"

"And we shouldn't even ask him to tell her, because you know what he'd say. And what if she doesn't know him well enough yet? What if she _does_ desert us? Do you know how crushed Remus would be? And what if she told someone else? Then Remus would leave!"

"Kamara would never do that," Sirius said defensively. Bewildered, Kamara wondered what they were arguing about, and what part she played in it. 

"No, maybe not, but we don't know for sure, and I'm willing to bet that Remus wouldn't want to take the chance. Not now, anyway. You remember what happened with Snape, don't you? You remember how scared he was? How much he blamed himself? What if something like that happens again?" _Snape? Where does Snape come in? _Another pause. 

"That was my fault, James," Sirius said hoarsely. "Not Remus's."

"Sirius, when Remus is ready, he'll tell her," James said solemnly after a long silence. "When he's ready."

Sirius sighed. There was a third pause, and then---

"I just wish we could do more for him," came Sirius's regretful voice. "You know it was a full moon last night? Can you imagine, James? The full moon, on _Christmas_." _What does the full moon have to do with anything? _

"I know," said James, and he sounded both disgusted and sympathetic. "He doesn't deserve it. Any of it." 

"He doesn't like it when we pity him, you know," Sirius mused. _Pity him for what?_

"Yeah, I know," sighed James. They were silent a bit longer. 

"Hey, I bet Birdie's up now," said Sirius, and once again his voice held all the youth and mischief that it usually did. "What should we say 'good morning' to her with today? Dungbomb? Fireworks?" She could hear them chattering about what chaos to cause that day, but she had already began to descend the stairs, puzzling over their secret. Something to do with Remus, and him not wanting to tell Kamara, and probably his monthly disappearances, and... and the full moon? 

Suddenly, the realization hit her like a zillion curses at once.

Remus was a werewolf.

~*~

A/N: All right, yes, I know I said that we'd get a POV from James in this chapter, but I also said that things can change, and guess what? They did! But I really hope that James's POV will be next chapter, because I'm looking forward to writing it.... I dunno, though, we'll have to see.... Also coming up next chapter: After a few scenes at Hogwarts, Christmas break will be over, Remus and Peter and everyone else will be back, um.... Remus will forget momentarily about the conversation between his parents when Kamara starts acting even more strangely (she's not sure he's a werewolf, she's debating it, and--- well, er, you'll see... I hope....) . I don't know when we'll get any actual lines from teachers or anything..... hopefully next chapter.....

My, I did have a lot of eavesdropping this chapter, didn't I? Oh well. 

Tell me, what do you think will happen? What do you want to happen? What do you think Kamara's secret is? Any suggestions, compliments, CONSTRUCTIVE criticism? Well, if you do, please review, it's greatly appreciated. 

ta ta! ~Xavi


	7. What If She Knows?

A/N: Hi! Well, here we go, Chapter Seven of my story. I feel so proud....

And you know what else? I am now secure enough to accept flames. So go ahead, flame me, but you still won't get rid of me. So there. 

You know what would make me feel really really special? 100 reviews. Yeah. But I probably won't get them, I don't really care, it's just the type of thing that every author dreams about.... Anyway, I would really love to hear your opinion on my story, so review anyway.

Please excuse all the spelling errors and punctuation mistakes; contrary to popular belief, I AM NOT PERFECT. Wow, it took a lot to admit that....

And I'm getting extremely busy, and coming up in the next few months I'm going to be involved in some very demanding clubs and programs and projects, so if I'm gone for like a week or two then don't worry, I'll be back, it just might be a while. 

Disclaimer: If I owned them, then I'd be rich, and I'd be sitting in my overstuffed leather chair, typing away on my state-of-the-art laptop, and I wouldn't have to write these "fics" to amuse myself, and I wouldn't have to use disclaimers. Now I'm depressed. I hope you're happy. 

Dedications: Same as before.

Thank You:

Reya: Oh I know, isn't Remus such a great guy? Compassionate, loyal, deep, kind.... I could go on forever. But I won't, because more than a few people would think I'm crazy. And thanks so much for thinking Kamara's cool! I tried, I really did, and I hope I'm not making her look like a Mary Sue.....

Yenny: I can't see LOTR. Now I'm really mad because I can't see it until it comes out. THAT SUCKS!!! *tears well up* I can't see LOTR... I can't see Elijah Wood.... Why is there such injustice in the world today? WHY?! Yeah, don't worry, I WILL finish it. I don't know how long it'll take, but I'll finish it, I promise. 

Morgana Lupin--- This good? 

Lily Evans--- thanks for signing in! And thanks for reviewing! 

Kitten-girl--- Really? You love it? I feel so special! And yeah, I know that A/N's aren't supposed to go in the middle of stories, but other authors do it too. Yes, that is my excuse, and yes, I know it is pathetic. 

Beth the Fox--- WHOOPEE!!!!! I have a "best work". Lovely little me! Honestly, though, I would really rather have you read the novel I'm writing, it's SO much better, much more professional, more interesting, more.... everything. But I won't post it on ff.net. No, Kam's fam aren't death eaters. Or ghosts or vamps or big foot or toasters while I'm at it. I'm having fun with this secret of hers.... I mean, we all know what Remus's is, but Kam's is interesting because I'm the only one that knows.... and I'm not telling.... And you do have my complete sympathy with math class. Not only are the people weird, but I took a math test today.... I didn't like it.... and I REALLY hope that I passed, at the very least.... or else pray for me, anyone....

Torquemada--- I know, don't you just hate it when the fics go like that? I didn't want this one to be like that, so I made it developed and stuff, but I didn't want to drag it out, and I'm afraid that's what I'm doing.... Kamara, for the most part, is quiet, and she's constantly got that "secret" on her mind. I like the way she's turning out, but I realized that I haven't given a physical description of her yet. I'll have to fit that into the story sometime.... And I have no idea why I'm not appearing. My work doesn't appear on my comp either unless I go to statistics or type in the title or something. 

I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!

~*~

__

Chapter Seven

~*~

Kamara had been going over everything in her mind for days. _Was Remus a werewolf? How? For how long? It would explain a lot, but where did Snape come in? How many people knew? Could Remus actually be trusted?_

Immediately after thinking that, Kamara mentally slapped herself shook her head. Of course Remus could be trusted. She trusted him before, why should things change now? Kamara had read before that werewolves were completely regular people when it wasn't the full moon, and even when they were in their animal form, they had no human sense or control in what they were doing. And Kamara was pretty sure that Remus hadn't gone off _wanting _to get bitten. 

That she understood. If Remus was indeed a werewolf, which she was beginning to doubt less and less, then she could accept it. Remus was one of her best and only friends; she wasn't about to through away a perfect friendship for something as trivial as being a werewolf. 

It was the fact that they hadn't bothered to tell her that made her angry. Did they think she couldn't handle it? Did they think she was too weak? Or did they think that she'd desert them? 

Kamara's thoughts kept running into each other, and she didn't know what to do with them or how to control them. Parts of her said that Remus wasn't a werewolf, there was no way, he was too kind--- but others said that even the best people can be werewolves. Some of her was angry at the four boys for not telling her; other parts of her understood why they hadn't told her. 

These thoughts left Kamara feeling tired and confused. 

She didn't know where to begin. She didn't know for sure that he was a werewolf, and how would she find out? "Hey Remus, how are you? Doing good? By the way, you wouldn't happen to be a werewolf, would you?" Oh yes, _that _would go over well. 

This was getting very frustrating. 

~*~

James tapped his fingers distractedly on his homework parchment (which just happened to be blank, despite the fact that he'd had the entire holiday to do it). Kamara had been acting very strange lately, like she wasn't all there; daydreaming half the time she was awake. Sirius had noticed, too, and was becoming worried. 

Which was why he and James were sitting in the deserted Common Room at this very moment, not talking about pranks or their next adventure as Animagi, not doing their homework, and not wondering how they were going to break the record for Most Detentions Ever Received. Instead, both boys sat at one of the various tables situated there, thoughtful expressions on their faces. Very thoughtful expressions. 

"What could be wrong with her?" Sirius asked for the eighth time that night. James felt like banging his head against the wall. 

Kamara was quiet, that he accepted, that he understood; but now it was as if she was avoiding them. Something wasn't right. If she hadn't come to by the end of the holidays, three days away, they'd ask Remus and Peter what they thought. 

It was that precise moment that Kamara chose to enter the Common Room by way of the portrait door. She was carrying a rather large load of books; she must have been in library. Well, that's not very uncommon, James thought hopefully. He and Sirius sprang up and beamed at her. If she was depressed, then they should be there for her. 

Kamara had barely gotten two feet into the room when Sirius and James sprang up on her. 

"Hiya Birdie, how are ya?" Sirius chirped. Kamara looked up at him from her pile of books, eyes wide. 

"Sirius! I was just... er... doing some... um... reading!" she sputtered. She bit her lip and shifted her weight. "And I really should be going, loads to do, you know!" And she nearly sprinted up her dormitory stairs, dropping a book without noticing. 

Sirius and James stared after her. _What is going _on _with her?_

Sirius walked slowly over to the stairs and picked up the book she had forgotten. James made his way over to him, narrowing his eyes as Sirius's widened. 

"James," Sirius's voice held something that sounded like a mixture of panic, shock, and another dose of panic for good measure. "Take a look at this," he said as he thrust the book into James's hands. James's eyes became about twenty times larger as he skimmed the cover. 

The title, ironically, was _How To Identify A Werewolf_.

James and Sirius turned their heads slowly to look up at the girl's door, and one thought crossed James's mind: _We are in _so _much trouble_. 

~*~

Kamara sighed loudly as she shut the door behind her. _Stupid, stupid, stupid! _She cursed herself. She knew that hadn't been the best way to exit. James and Sirius had been acting more strangely around her, and they knew something was wrong. She slumped over to her bed and dumped the books she had been carrying there before throwing herself down as well. She stared up at the canopy and massaged her temples. 

James and Sirius were concerned, she knew that. She was grateful in the smallest bit, but she had too many other thoughts. 

Sitting up on her bed, she sighed again and picked up the first book, _The Life Of A Werewolf_, and began to read. 

As she finished the last book, she found herself understanding why the boys hadn't told her. And she understood how Remus would feel. From what she'd read, being a werewolf was both physically and emotionally draining. Being a werewolf meant a lifetime of ridicule and discrimination. Transformations were spoke of in relation to the "Cruciatus Curse". Even though Kamara didn't know what this was, the title convinced her that it wasn't pleasant. 

And some people had to go through that every month.... some people had to _live _that..... She found herself desperately praying that Remus wasn't one of those people. 

She looked for the last book, the most important one, and realized with horror that she didn't have it. 

~*~

__

This is bad. This is very, very bad. This is worse than bad. This is....

James was pacing fretfully in the boy's dormitory as Sirius talked to him, ranting off ideas. 

"We could try the casual approach, ask her what she was doing with the book, and if she knows then...."

__

What would Remus say? What if Kamara knows, and she hates us?

"...Or we could obliviate her, and then she'd never know, and everything could go back to normal...." 

"No," James said suddenly. Sirius's head shot up. He'd been the only one talking for the past fifteen minutes. "Wait until Remus gets back. Just pretend nothing happened. When Remus gets here, we tell him about it. And she'll... she'll...."

"James, _what if she knows?_" 

"I don't know," James admitted desperately after a short silence. "Sirius, if she does know, I mean, if she's sure about it, then what do you think she would do?" he asked cautiously after a minute.

"Birdie? ....I think she'd be okay with it...." Sirius considered. He set his face into a solemn expression. "She wouldn't care. Not Kamara. She's not like that, James." James nodded and ran a hand over his face. 

This was such a risk. Such a choice. _Why can't Remus be here right now? _

"All right. We just won't say anything until Remus gets back. Then we'll tell him what we think and do what he says," James decided. _Remus will know what to do._

But can we hold her off until he gets back?

~*~

A/N: Yes, well. I don't really like this chapter. I didn't have as much fun as I thought I would with James's thoughts, so I think that I'll mess with head sometime soon again. 

Preview for next chapter: Remus and Peter are back, I THINK there'll be an argument between... um... people.... Kamara's suspicions will be confirmed AND she'll say she's okay with it and they'll make up and apologize and.... uh... yeah. It'll probably be longer and kinda dramatic. But no romance until Remus finds out about Kamara's secret, which probably won't be for a few chapters yet. BUT THINGS CAN CHANGE (and they probably will). 

Please review, please review, please review! I do thank-you's to all my reviewers! 


	8. Kids Today

A/N: Me here, reporting yet another chapter of my semi-plot-less story. Anywho, I don't really know what's happening anymore, I failed my last math test and now my average is a D so unless I get a hundred on the next math test so that I can bring my average up to a C (the lowest C I can get, by the way). Pity me? You should. You really should. Anyway, email me with suggestions and/or leave a review so that I can stop brooding on my math grade. Geez, I just HAD to ask what it was just as we got off for the holidays.... what a dolt I am.... now I feel so pathetic... well, off to wallow in self pity.... leave a review and make me feel better.... 

****

IMPORTANT NOTICE: Okay, I'm getting extremely busy, I have a zillion other things to write (literally), a bunch of clubs I'm in, yearbook duties, HOMEWORK from THE EVIL ONE (a messed up teacher of mine), _MATH TESTS _(somebody, anybody, help me....), and a ton of other things that I don't feel like mentioning right now PLUS my sister is spending a lot more time on the computer now, ever since she got some computer game for Christmas.... Stupid Santa.... Anyway, If I don't get a chapter up for a week or two weeks or a month or something, don't worry, I'm not dead, just busy. I WILL finish this story, though, no matter how long it takes me. 

Disclaimer: Oh, sure, twist the knife a little deeper why don't you? As _if _getting an F in math isn't enough to make me wanna jump off a cliff, I have to be reminded that I own none of the fabulous characters that I get to write about. Don't sue me, because then I really would start to feel just horrible.... 

Dedications: Beth, Yenny, Ice, The Dancing Mailbox, Eschew Obfuscation, uh..... anyone else? Oh yeah. JK Rowling, Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint, Emma Watson, Richard Harris, Tom Felton, Robbie Coltrane, Maggie Smith, Alan Rickman, those two guys who played the Weasley twins, Sean Biggerstaff, ummmmm..... and everybody else! Oh, and Elijah Wood, just because. 

Thank You: 

Beth the Fox: It was short, wasn't it? Sorry bout that. I'll try to make 'em longer from here on out. You know, I just read chapter six over, and I have to agree, it is my favorite. Btw, you know how you're a math genius? Well....

Yenny: You SURE you liked that chapter? Hm. Okay. Thank you for the ego boost! I needed it! (echo: *snort*) Also, I hear that you're a math genius too. You see where I'm going with this? 

Lily Evans: I sure hope you're liking this. I don't wanna let anybody down....

Fyre Eye: *demonic cackle* OH, how I loooooove being evil...... Mwahahaha.... it is one of the few pleasures I have left of life, after I took that wretched math test.... 

Echo Chik: Simply MAH-velous vocabulary, DAH-ling, MAH-velous. LOVE-ly little review you left me, simply LOVE-ly little thing to brighten my day. Spread the insanity!!!

Peaceful Storm: Can you email me with your idea about our dearest Kammie? Because I'd really like to know. Please? My addy is: rose_of_the_moon@hotmail.com. And thank you SO much for the wonderful review!!! Muah! I'm going to finish this story if it kills me, even though it may take a while to get chapters up in between. 

Reine Dansante: I am just so... so... happy! Ecstatic! Floating on cloud nine, here! You are such a nice person! Cookie for you! You wonderful person! Such lovely reviews! (you know, I really should quit complimenting people so freely. It ruins my reputation. But who cares? Not me!)

Reya: I know, isn't it horrible? My parents are soooooo mean. I guess that's why they're parents. The Remus romance should come... oh... chapter ten, me thinks. Thanks for reviewing!

Erimentha: *bows* Yes, master. Your wish is my command. I am here to obey. (OOOOOHH!!!!!! Lookee here, my chickadees! This one's on the right track!) Thank you for reviewing!!!

~*~

__

Chapter Eight

~*~

It had been nothing but frustrating bewilderment for Remus in the last few days of his vacation. He had tried just about everything to find out what his parents had been talking about that night, but it was pretty hard, since he couldn't even use magic to spy. His parents, however, didn't even seem to be talking about it anymore, though it was very obvious that something serious had happened, because both his mother and father had been acting sullen and dejected. Remus had tried to find that newspaper, but it was no use. Everything he'd tried was in vain. _They must've thrown the paper away_, Remus thought ruefully. 

Now, Remus wasn't one to pry, especially when it didn't concern him, but it was effecting his parents drastically compared with how they usually were. And if it had something to do with his parents, then it had something to do with him. 

For the moment, however, spying and prying weren't doing him any good. _I'll wait till I get back to Hogwarts. Maybe James or Sirius will know something. _

But back at Hogwarts, James and Sirius had other concerns.... 

~*~

James and Sirius watched Kamara, who was staring intently into the fire of their Common Room, from the thick oak table, unbeknownst to her. 

"I still say we should obliviate her," Sirius whispered irritably. James rolled his eyes. 

"_No_," he whispered back forcefully. "Remus will be back tomorrow morning, just be _patient_, Sirius." James, of course, knew that asking Sirius to be patient wouldn't do anything except shut him up for a few minutes. 

Kamara was starting to act like she had before the Marauders stepped into the scene, and this scared James, because the Kamara that he remembered before the Marauders was not a happy one. And as he stared at Kamara now, watching her dark hair glitter with the fire, her blue eyes gazing pensively into the flames, he couldn't help but wonder just what it was that made her act like that before. 

He shook his head slightly and concentrated again on the situation at hand. Kamara hadn't said anything to them since they ran into her two days ago, when she was carrying those books. She seemed to be lost in her own little world. She hadn't let on any clue that she _knew_ about Remus' lycanthropy. (a/n: that is right, isn't it? lycanthropy? my spell check says it's not a word....)

__

If she knows, James thought, _why hasn't she said anything? _

~*~ 

Kamara didn't notice as James and Sirius left the Common Room and headed up to their dorm, just as she hadn't noticed them enter it. She sat huddled in a large armchair next to the blazing fire, staring into it while her mind was doing laps with all kinds of thoughts and ideas. She hadn't moved in a few hours, and she had yet to notice the cramp that was starting up in her legs, which were curled beneath her. If one were to walk into the Gryffindor Common Room at this very moment, they would have to take a good look around to realize that they weren't alone. 

In all honesty, Kamara really didn't know what to do anymore. Part of her wished she had never found out about the secret, that way, instead of brooding, she could be laughing and joking with James and Sirius and not despairing over the whole thing. Another part of her challenged the first by suggesting that her suspicions weren't even correct. The rest of her was searching the far corners of her mind and back for anything that might help Remus in the slightest. 

The entire issue left her completely out of sorts. It felt like she was banging her head against a wall. _Couldn't things, for just once in my life, be simple_? she thought to herself scornfully.

~*~

"Moony, old boy!" Sirius bellowed upon Remus' entrance through the portrait hole the next morning. James, Sirius and Peter jumped up from the couch and stampeded over to him (they had just been discussing with Peter about Kamara and what they thought she suspected), slapped him on the back by way of greeting and then promptly pushed him over to the couch. 

"How was your holiday?" 

"Get any good gifts?" 

"How much did you miss us?"

"How's your Mum?"

"Did you like the present I got you?"

"Did you get all your homework done?"

Remus stared, wide eyed, at his three friends after they had finished rambling off niceties in about twenty seconds. They were obviously trying to pump him up for some bad news. They'd used this tactic before. 

"All right, what you'd do and how bad is the punishment?" The other three's bright, false smiles faded just a bit as they glanced at each other, panicked. _It's worse than I thought._ Remus sighed.

"_Please_ tell me you didn't send McGonagall another howler or blow up another toilet seat?" he begged. Their smiles relaxed a little and Remus sighed again, relieved. "What did you do then?" 

"Honestly, Remus, what makes you think we did something?" Sirius replied innocently. Remus cocked an eyebrow. 

"Guys...." he began slowly, "What happened?" The three looked at each other and sighed. Then James spoke up. 

"Remus, you know how you have that little affiliation with the full moon?" Remus immediately tensed and he nodded slowly, apprehensively. "Well, what would you say if someone else knew about it?" Remus blinked and let his eyes stray from his friends' worried faces to the dim fire.

"Because we think that... that Kamara might know," Peter indicated when Remus said nothing. 

"Kamara," he whispered, still staring into the fire. 

"Yeah," Sirius said, his voice cautious. "She hasn't said anything, but we found her with a book on werewolves... a few books, actually." 

"I see." 

Silence. 

"Remus," James started, "What should we do? What do you want us to do?" 

Remus considered this for a while_. I should have known she'd find out_, he thought ruefully. _But they aren't sure she knows, _said a little voice in the back of his head. _I think it's about time I told her, then, _he decided. He looked up at the three other boys. 

"She deserves to know the truth," he declared in a slightly defeated tone. His friends nodded, accepting his decision. "I'll tell her. She should hear it from me." Sirius swallowed, hesitantly, then spoke.

"Remus, you don't have to, you know. We could just obliviate her and things could go back---"

"No," Remus cut him off. "If she's our friend, then she deserves to know. It's not fair to her." Remus sighed again, resolutely. 

__

I just hope she understands.

~*~

Remus was sitting by the fire when Kamara came down into the Common Room later that day, when everyone had just left for dinner. He'd have to tell her now. He wasn't sure he'd be able to later. 

"Kamara," Remus called to her. She instantly snapped her head toward him, and looked very much awake. _She's probably scared_, he thought with devastation. He'd hoped---hoped desperately---that she'd accept this. He'd thought that just maybe she'd be like James and Sirius and Peter. 

But no. 

He'd have to tell her, though. He owed her that much. And he had no doubt that Kamara would keep it a secret. She wasn't that cruel. He'd only lose her friendship. 

"Kamara, I--I need to talk to you," he began hesitantly. She nodded and walked slowly over to the couch he was seated on, sitting across from him. 

"I've been meaning to talk to you, too," she began in a slightly cautious, yet steady voice. Remus nodded and swallowed. Kamara looked at him, straight in the eyes, and stared at him hard. Her stare was powerful, and Remus found that he couldn't break out of it. It was as though she was reading into him, into everything he'd ever thought. Her usually gorgeous deep blue eyes were piercing at the moment and they kept a strong hold on his weary gray ones.

"Remus...." she paused, her voice wavering. She cleared her throat and blinked, looking away from him. He shook his head, filled with the sudden urge to speed away in the other direction and tell Kamara nothing. "Remus, are... are you...." she sighed exasperatedly. "God, this is so hard to ask you... you'll hate me...." 

He knew what she wanted to ask. And when she asked, he'd have to tell her the truth, because there was no way he could lie to her after the way she'd just stared at him. It was obvious that she was struggling with her words, obvious that she didn't want to hurt him. 

But she would. The moment he admitted the truth, she'd turn around and walk away. She desert him and never speak to him again. _Why do I have to tell her again? _he asked himself. _Because she's been your friend this long, and she deserves to know the truth_, reminded that same, annoying little voice in the back of Remus' head. He took a deep breath. 

"Kamara...." he breathed deep again, "I'm a werewolf."

~*~

He said it so quietly Kamara could barely hear. He didn't even look at her. He kept his eyes glued firmly to the floor. Kamara swallowed. It must have taken a lot for him to say that. And by the looks of things, it wasn't a topic he was very fond of. 

__

Well, no duh, Kamara, she reprimanded herself sarcastically. _Would _you_ going telling everyone that you were a werewolf?_

Kamara stared at him, her eyes pouring with understanding. Cautiously, she reached out a pale hand to touch his shoulder. He jumped very slightly and turned to look at her. She could see the hurt in his eyes. All the pain, the agony, the suffering. It was all in his eyes, and there was a lot of it. Kamara recognized that look. 

Remus swallowed. "Please," he begged quietly, "don't tell anyone. I mean, I know you probably never want to speak to me again, but---" Kamara's eyes widened. 

"What?! Is that what you think?! That just because you're a werewolf, I'd stop being your friend?!" she burst out, taking her hand away from his shoulder. Her eyes blazed. "You really don't have a very high opinion of me, do you?! I don't believe you think I'd sink so low! Do I really come off that heartless?!" She'd stood up, and was glaring at Remus with both a mixture of shock and fury. Remus stood up as well, ready to set Kamara straight. 

"Kamara! No! I just... it's...." he lowered his voice, "Well, not many people care to associate with werewolves," he explained, his tone somewhat harsh. Kamara immediately backed down. 

"Is that what this is about? You think that because you're a werewolf, it gives everyone license to hate you?" Remus was silent. Kamara's eyes became, if possible, even wider. "Remus! How--- what---" Kamara took a deep breath and ran a hand through her long, ebony-colored hair, streaked naturally with a lovely copper. "Remus," she began again, this time in a calmer voice, "I know that some people... some people don't approve... but Remus... I'm... I'm not one of those people," she finished finally. "I don't care if you're a werewolf, a vampire or even Sirius' crazy twin (Remus smiled slightly at this). You're my friend. You're my _best friend_. I don't know where I'd be without you. You've always been there when I needed you, and I'm certainly not going to hate you for something that you can't even help," she whispered. She vaguely noticed that there were tears in her eyes. 

All she remembered before falling asleep on the couch in the Common Room was how good it felt to have Remus' arms around her, embracing her, thanking her, and holding her. 

~*~

__

Well, well, well, Sirius thought with amusement as he, James and Peter stepped into the Common Room not long after, staring gleefully at the two figures on the couch. They had come up from dinner early just in case Remus needed back up (which wasn't saying a whole lot, because the Marauders were usually the first to the Great Hall and the last to leave, and coming up early meant about ten minutes before everyone else). _What have we here? _

He grinned slyly at James and Peter, who returned it equally. They huddled.

"Looks like Remus told Kammie bout his lycanthropy. So, what do you think? Should we wake them up and torment them or leave them for the rest of the Gryffindor house to find in--- oh, I give it five minutes ---and torment them?" Sirius asked casually. James' eyes sparkled malevolently. 

"I say we wake them up--- it's more fun when we torment them." 

"I'm with James," Peter agreed. Sirius nodded and his grin became wider. He whistled and walked nonchalantly over to Remus and Kamara, pausing to stare at them for a moment. Kamara had her head resting on Remus' shoulder and he had his arm around her shoulders. They both looked so cute and comfortable. 

Count on Sirius to disturb that.

"Wait, Sirius," Peter intervened just as Sirius was advancing on them, "Don't you want a picture first?" Sirius' eyes gleamed like a little boy's at the prospect of sweets. Grinning like a madman (something he was very good at), he ruffled Peter's hair ("Wormtail, you're a genius!") and summoned a camera from their dorm. 

"Prongs, would you do the honors?" He held the camera out to James. 

"Of course, Padfoot. It is _my_ camera, after all." James took a picture of the two, and then another, just in case the first one was off, and then a third, for variety. He was about to take a forth when Remus blinked and opened his eyes. He stared around at his three friends who were frozen in their tracks. Then he warily looked at the position he was in. (a/n: if this was in Remus' POV right now, his thoughts would go something like: "Uh-oh.") His eyes took in Kamara's head, resting peacefully on his shoulder (and Sirius was sure he didn't mind one bit--- _he_ sure wouldn't have minded if Kamara had been all over _him_), completely innocent to the whole ordeal. Remus sprang up from the couch without thinking, thus letting Kamara's lovely little head fall onto the cushion of the couch, waking her. She moaned softly and rubbed her eyes. 

"Wakey-wakey Birdie, nappy-time is over!" Sirius teased, poking Kamara with his wand (which made her hair flare green for a moment). 

"Sirius," she began groggily, "how many times have I told you NOT TO WAKE ME UP?!" She had screamed the last part with her Pop-Your-Ear Voice (as Sirius had artfully dubbed it), which had a big impact on Sirius, who had been hovering over her. He backed away (leaped away, jumped away, sprang back a good few feet, whichever suits you best) and smiled angelically (Kamara snorted sardonically and rolled her eyes at this), batting his eyelashes. 

"Now, Birdie, no need to shout! We're all here, and no one has bad hearing, do we gentlemen?" (This statement was promptly met by three "What?! Speak up!"'s and another eye roll from Kamara.) 

"All right, that's about all the insanity I can take for one night. See you guys in the morning." And she flounced up the stairs just as the rest of the Gryffindor household stampeded in, ignoring the four "I can't hear you!"'s from the Marauders. 

Sirius watched Remus follow Kamara up the stairs with his eyes and sighed mentally (He did that a lot. Sighing out loud was not a Sirius-thing to do). Really. If Remus could tell Kamara about his lunar obligation, then why was admitting that he liked her so bloody hard? 

Honestly. Kids today. 

~*~ 

A/N: I hope you don't hate me for the way I wrote that. Did I make it too soppy? I swear, that was probably the hardest part I've had to write. I don't think I did it right. 

If you're curious as to why Peter arrives at Hogwarts before Remus, it's because Remus had to go talk to one of the professors about... um... something. I don't feel like making up a good excuse and writing it into the story. And I also realized something. I'm doing a horrible job of including characters besides the Marauders and Kamara and setting the story in a place other than the Gryffindor Common Room. Give me suggestions, people! Just a little help! Maybe I can take a suggestion and then build an idea from there.... who else do you want to see in the story? I want to get a classroom scene in here, but it doesn't look like that's going to happen.... I know of a scene, though, that will take place in the Shrieking Shack. *evil grin* And that's my little secret. MWAHAHAHAHA!!!! ahem. I scare myself sometimes.... (echo: you scare everyone all the time.) 

You know what? I had fun writing this chapter. No, it's not my greatest, but I had fun. It was a nice break from everything else. I could almost forget about that blasted math test while I was writing this....

Next chapter: We'll start to get into Kamara's secret. Oh, the poor girl. It's just so sad. Poor, depressed little Kamara, what with--- no, that would ruin it! HA! You can't make me tell! 


	9. One Question

A/N: You guys are the best ever! Oh my gosh! I have over seventy-five reviews! You know what this means, don't you?! Less than twenty-five more reviews to a hundred!!! Dare I dream? In truth, I never expected this much. I mean, this is just an amateur work of mine, I'm just starting with the fanfiction. Anyways, in this chapter, we'll be seeing more of the Slytherin four (I got more interaction from other characters!!! Genius of me, isn't it?), the guys will really start to wonder what Kamara is hiding (yeah, I know, jumping from one secret to another, but I want to get into Kamara now), and we'll learn a little more about her. Also, you know the Marauder's Map? Well, let's just say that they make it in their sixth year, because I'm going to concentrate on Kamara's secret right now.

Side note: And to anyone who cares, I checked into it, because I was doing some research for this fic because I was thinking about a certain thing (I can't tell you what it is because I might be using this idea in the story) and I came across that word "lycanthropy". Lycanthropy is the medical term that is used; a lycanthrope would be in reference to the werewolf. I don't know if you get that or if you even care, but I thought I might as well share. (But melli, you were right, lycanthrope doesn't show up on spell check but lycanthropy does. Go figure.) 

Disclaimer: I own Kamara and that's it. Everything else is... ahem... borrowed. Don't sue. 

Dedications: The same as last chapter (I am NOT retyping all those names up), with a few new additions: **Reine Dansante **because her fics are absolutely fantabulous AND to **Snowlily** because her fics are awesome too, plus she left sixteen reviews (a model citizen.... ^_~) AND cquill because, guess what, I'M ON HER FAVORITES!!! YAY!!! 

Thank you: 

****

Aimee: Yes, mistress. Whatever you say. Glad to hear you loved it! **Beth: **HOW COULD YOU LET YOUR STORY DIE??? WELL, YOU'D BETTER UN-DIE IT THEN, SHOULDN'T YOU! ahem. *blushes* sorry, it was echo, he made me do it. (echo: you are soooo pathetic.) And this teacher is not only demonized, she also _taught my dad_. Yeah, unbelievable, isn't it? **Reine: **You can relate to Kamara too? Really, now, see, that's funny, because Kamara is based somewhat on myself. With my online friends, I act crazy, like myself. But with my other friends, I'm more subdued. A lot more subdued (and honey, I've read your stuff, so don't tell me you're not as smart as Kam). So you're flunking out of the 8th grade too, huh? We should form a club. **Fyre Eye: **You know, I do try to come off as the evil villain. I'm so happy my efforts are recognized. Now it's my turn. EVIL YOU!!!! THREATENING ME WITH--- WITH--- SANITY!!! I MEAN, THAT'S ALMOST AS BAD AS BARNEY!!! All right, now that I've said that.... thank you so much for reviewing! Muah! **Moonshine: **Thank you, thank you, thank you! What a sweet review! *wipes tear* You people are all so nice to me, and I don't think I deserve it! You lovely people! I'm a great writer? What a compliment! *beams* Yep, my ego is doing just fine... **Reya: **I know _exactly_ what you mean. I have read so many fics that go like that. I wanted Kamara's response to be different, but I didn't want her to desert Remus. Kamara may not be perfect, and she does fight with the Marauders, but she'd never desert any of them. She's a good person. She's just got a lot going on, and that's why she gave that particular response. I'm glad to hear that you liked it, though. =)**Yenny: **Well, I _would've _seen LOTR today, but my stupid cousins had to come over. **Sam and Melli-chan:** You guys reviewed! muah! kissies to you both! Thanks for the tip, melli! Hope y'all like this chapter! **LadyLupin: **I am so glad to hear that you like Kammie. I think she is turning out nicely, a little better than I expected. Thank you SO much for reviewing! **MWPP's partner in crime: **You're a saint. A goddess. A hero. THANK YOU! ahem. I doubt this story is on anyone's favorites, though. I'll try not to leave many cliffhangers. I've just gotten into that horrible habit. (I know, I'm evil, various people have told me that.) **cquill13: **Brilliant? Me? Yes, well... I try. *beams* YOU HEAR THAT, PEOPLE?! I'M BRILLIANT! (echo: *rolls eyes* please, spare me the drama.) And here's the update. I hope you like it! Oh my sweet sugar.... I'm on your favorites! I feel SO special! **Switch: **You people are so sweet! Yes, I felt that Sirius would be exactly the kind of person to say "old boy". But truly, this is a rather amateur piece of work, and it's only the beginning of my fanfiction. =) Thank you for reviewing, you nice person you! **Lesse: **Thank you for reviewing! **Torquemada: **Thank you for supporting me! I really tried not to make it to... fluffy. But believe me, I have a feeling that when the romance comes, it'll be just that: romance. You've been warned! But I'll try not to make it unbearable. **Snowlily: ***blink, blink* sixteen reviews... YOU SWEET PERSON!!! *wipes tear* you people are just so nice! sixteen reviews.... All right... that motivated me... that got me moving.... here is CHAPTER NINE!!!!! all right, people, start cheering and throwing confetti now. 

~*~

__

Chapter Nine

~*~

Remus had completely forgotten about the newspaper article that his parents had discussed that night during the holidays. He had forgotten about how distraught his parents were over it. And he didn't care, because everything was right again. There were no more secrets! Kamara now knew everything: Remus was a werewolf; James, Sirius and Peter were Animagi; the Whomping Willow led to the Shrieking Shack; and they were planning on sneaking into the Slytherin Common Room that weekend to pilfer a pair of Snape's underwear, enlarge it and hang it over the Slytherin flag in the Great Hall with the words "Snape has a hairy butt" written on the boxers (that's what they were hoping he wore). Well, technically, the last part wasn't really a secret to anyone but a Slytherin, but Sirius considered it to be just as vital. 

Kamara was visibly more cheery, and she once more joined the ranks of the Marauders. She treated Remus just the same as she had before, and for this, Remus was very grateful. He wouldn't have felt comfortable if Kamara had been pitying him all the time, sympathizing and the like. He would have been even more devastated if Kamara had still hung around the Marauders but avoided him, regarding him coldly or worse--- with fear. 

It was the fear Remus hated. Many people would back away, their eyes wide, gasping and frightened after discovering the truth. The rejection and taunting he could deal with; they would hurt, yes, but everyone is offended or insulted at some point in their life. The sympathy he could tolerate. But the fear--- that was what hurt the most. Regarding him as though he were a monster; inhuman. Yes, it was true that once a month he was those things, but he had no control over that and those things didn't apply to him when it wasn't a full moon, though some people acted like they did. 

But not Kamara. Not James. Not Sirius or Peter. 

And Remus would never forget _that_.

~*~ 

Breakfast on the first day of the new term was a raucous affair, and at the Gryffindor table especially (naturally; Sirius sat at that table). Kamara had already been flicked at with pumpkin juice twice (compliments of Sirius), assaulted with orange peels at least five times (Sirius' handiwork) and pelted in the head with toast pieces more times than she could count (Sirius was the only one having toast that morning). She ignored it all and jovially carried on her conversation with Remus about their Runes class. James was currently having a Death Glare war with Lily Evans, who'd woken up to black teeth and a mirror that constantly insulted her. Her revenge had been an enchanted picture of James, dressed up in pink frilly robes with his messy, jet-black hair in two barely distinguishable pigtails, publicized for the entire school to see (she'd posted various copies around the castle). Peter was trying to eat without being hit with provisions himself. Yep, everything was right in the world once more.

So, naturally, something would happen to make it all come crashing down. 

Four certain Slytherins came strutting smugly into the Great Hall at this point, with a particular platinum-haired boy leading the way to the Gryffindor table, clutching what looked like a volume of the Daily Prophet in his bony hands. He stopped short of Kamara and the Marauders (who were situated at the end of the table), with a very obvious look of condescension and odd satisfaction. 

"Say, Dayton," he began, referring to Kamara, "how does it feel to be a victim?" She raised an eyebrow. 

"Excuse me?" she replied, her puzzlement evident in her expression. Snape and Malfoy smirked, ignoring the incensed glares that the Marauders were sending their way. 

"The article, Dayton," Snape supplied, his voice holding a tone of amusement and contempt. Kamara raised both eyebrows. Malfoy smiled then--- a cold, evil smile that suited him perfectly. It was a forewarning; it meant that he was about to say something very cruel and nasty, and he was going to drop the bomb mercilessly.

"Why, don't tell me you've forgotten, Dayton? It was only eight years ago," Kamara's eyes got very wide and she grew very pale, "and they _were_ your family, after all. Even a mudblood like yourself can't have forgotten something like _that_." Kamara gaped at him in alarm. _How the bloody hell did he find out?! What if he tells?! They can't know, they just can't, not when everything has just gotten better, not now, please not now! _

"Malfoy, could you do us all a favor and leave?" Remus' voice was an icy calm, but Kamara could detect other things in it: anger, confusion, and something else she couldn't quite place. Malfoy opened his mouth to retort but closed it promptly after seeing James and Sirius take their wands out. 

"Fine with us, right boys? It isn't like we'd want to stay in the presence of you _Gryffindors_," and they sauntered off to their table. All four boys turned to Kamara (who was looking very anxious), concerned expressions on their faces. She stared uneasily at her plate, not looking at any of them. She had turned a rather disturbing shade of white, and the boys were becoming more than slightly worried. 

"Kamara?" Remus began gently, putting a hand to her shoulder. She jumped up at his touch, nearly falling. 

"I just remembered... something... homework... see you at class," and she darted off toward the door, leaving the four boys completely clueless and staring helplessly after her. 

~*~

"What was _that_ all about?" Sirius began, eyeing the door that Kamara had just zipped through. 

"Should we go after her?" Peter asked, looking around at the other three. James nodded as he stood up.

"Yeah, I think we sho---" 

"No," Remus interrupted. The other three turned to stare at him, questioning him. But Remus was gazing thoughtfully in the direction that Kamara had exited. "Leave her. She needs to be alone." The other three nodded slowly and sat back down, returning to their breakfast. But things weren't so lively and joyous anymore.

~*~ 

Kamara wasn't sure quite how Malfoy and his little pets knew about her parents, but she sat in the owlery all the same, head in her hands, cursing her own dumb luck. It was so typical that something like this would pop up just as everything had gotten better. _What was Snape on about? An article? A newspaper?_

Kamara looked at the owl next to the window, perched on a stand. It was pure white, so brilliant that it seemed almost celestial. She walked over to it. There was something intriguing about that owl. She had never seen it here before; and she made regular trips to the owlery. There was something oddly unnerving about it, with it's unblinking, unnaturally blue eyes. Kamara held it's gaze and was about to stick her hand out to touch it when it turned it head backwards and back to her again before she could blink, and in it's beak was a paper. 

A newspaper. 

With a front page announcing something Kamara had prayed would never be brought up again.

~*~

"Misters Black, Potter, Lupin, Pettigrew.... have any of you a premonition as to where Miss Dayton may be?" Minerva asked in her No-fooling-around Voice, looking sternly around the room with her skeptical eyes. The four stirred. 

"Er... she was.. um... devoured by... um... a flobberworm?" Sirius suggested. The class chuckled and Minerva saw Remus roll his eyes, sending a glare towards Sirius. She cocked an eyebrow and turned to him, like she usually did whenever she wanted a half-way believable explanation. He sighed. 

"She went to see Madame Pomfrey. She was feeling sick," Remus answered. Minerva stared at him for a moment, trying to decide if he was telling the truth or not. _At least his excuse is probable_, she thought irritably. She nodded curtly at Remus, settling on the fact that they knew next to nothing about Kamara's situation. She had thought that Kamara might have told them in light of that wretched article, or that they might have at least seen the paper for themselves. She supposed she shouldn't be surprised, though; that issue had come out during break, and everyone was plenty busy over the holidays. 

Continuing with the lesson, she couldn't help but feel pity for Kamara in the back of her mind. 

~*~

Remus, meanwhile, was paying no attention whatsoever to the lesson (which was a big change for him), as his mind was wandering on other things. Snape had said something about an article... what article? What was in the article? What happened eight years ago? _What did any of it have to do with Kamara? _

Then he realized it. _It's so bloody obvious. _

It was clearly the same article that his parents had been talking about. 

All that was left was to find the paper. 

(A/N: I could end the chapter here, you know. But I'm not that mean.)

~*~

In the fifth year Gryffindor girl's dormitory, a certain Kamara Dayton could be found, sobbing softly into her pillow, hidden under her bed covers. 

__

Damn. 

That was the one thing that echoed in her mind. _Damn everything_. 

She had worked so hard, keeping It a secret from everyone. She hadn't told anyone about It, avoided and evaded all questions that might lead to discussing It. She had been so careful, so cautious... and all for what? Now everything was ruined. They'd know now. Everyone would know. 

Everyone in the entire bloody wizarding world. 

Well, everyone who read the _Daily Prophet _anyway, but there were plenty of people. 

__

What I wouldn't give to die right now, she thought miserably. 

Kamara didn't usually give up easily, but there was nothing she could do to fight this. In a little while, the four boys that she had grown to love would demand some explanation, she'd have to tell them the truth, and they'd know that she'd been lying to them all along, and everything that she had worked so hard to maintain would be gone. It wasn't enough that her family life was ruined, but now, the only friendship that she'd ever had would be lost too. 

Brilliant. Lovely. Wasn't this just the best day of her life. 

Kamara put a pillow over her head in hopes to muffle the soft sobs.

~*~

Hogwarts was an awfully large school.

James and Co. had found this out while asking various wanderers, peers, teachers, ghosts, paintings and Jehova's witnesses if they had a _Daily Prophet _from the holidays. 

Remus had explained to James, Sirius and Peter that whatever was going on with Kamara had something to do with the paper that Malfoy was clutching earlier. He told them about what he had overheard when he was home over break. He also reminded them that whatever was stated in the paper might not be pretty, and that they should be discreet about the whole ordeal, seeming as Kamara didn't appear to be entirely fond of it. 

Sometimes Remus' intelligence scared James. 

But even Remus' genius couldn't help them find one single person in the entire student/staff/spirit/decoration/Jehova's witness body with that blasted article. They weren't even sure of the date, or the title, or even the subject matter. 

And this is where we meet our four fabled friends, trudging dolefully through a deserted hallway after a long day of classes and excuses and questions, too tired and dispirited and troubled to ask anyone else about the mystery newspaper. They could always ask Malfoy, as Sirius had suggested at one point that day after Peeves had pelted him with rotten fruit for asking him, to which Sirius received three eye-rolls and a smack in the head. 

It would just happen that, just outside the Gryffindor Common Room, in front of the portrait of the Fat Lady, was a blindingly white owl, perched atop what appeared to be a perfectly intact copy of the _Daily Prophet_, dated December 22. Upon closer inspection, this owl would prove to have unsettling blue eyes, sharp and piercing, unnaturally wise for an owl or any animal, for that matter. 

"What's that?" Peter questioned, staring pointedly at the owl. James narrowed his eyes and stepped forward, and just before he could reach the owl, it flew off down the hallway, leaving the four staring after it. 

"Who's owl is that? James, do you know?" Remus asked. But James wasn't listening, because he had picked up the newspaper, and there on the front page, clear as a bludger in a state of frozen panic, was what they had been searching for the entire day, and he was reading every word with wide eyes. The other three crowded around him, and four pairs of eyes were speeding over the cover, each individual sinking deeper into a shocked stupor with every new detail. 

This is what the article said:

**_DAYTON MYSTERY SOLVED _**

Eight years ago, Miles and Charlotte Dayton were found murdered in their living room, with what has now been named the "Dark Mark" hovering over their house. This was an incredible puzzle for the ministry for more than a few reasons. 

The Daytons were murdered for their talent in the Auror department, and their skill was well-known, and they were murdered by followers of You-know-who. Eight years ago, there was no such evidence (besides the Dark Mark) to testify this realization. Now that You-know-who is becoming more well-known himself, his ways are as well, and many are beginning to recognize the mysteries of years gone by as his own dirty work. 

Miles and Charlotte had one daughter, Kamara, who was seven years old at the time. Experts suspect that the servants of You-know-who were unaware of the child's presence in the house at the time, otherwise she would have departed the earth with her parents as well. Kamara has spent the last eight years with her aunt and uncle, Seth and Leiko Bradford, and is in her sixth year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. 

The article ended there, leaving many questions for many other people, but there was only one thing on the Marauders' minds. 

__

Why didn't she tell us? 

~*~

A/N: I'm horrible, I know! I HATE that ending! I wanted to leave it with the article, but I wanted the article to be GOOD! I'll never be a news reporter. 

Preview for next chapter: Actually, I think I'll just leave you in suspense. MWAHAHAHAHA!!!! ahem. 

Now, just a short little plug before I beg you for reviews: If you're into dr/herm romances, check out my one-time fic thing (no chapters), "I Paid Attention To Love". I've heard it's pretty good. If you don't like those kind of fics, just ignore me then. It shouldn't be that hard to do. 

PLEASE REVIEW!!! I always do thank-yous and I try to answer any questions you may have and I always try to take any suggestions into consideration. What did you think of the peek in McGonagall's mind? I don't know why I did that.... REVIEW!!! Or flame me, I don't care, you won't get rid of me. I haven't got one yet, and I'm surprised, and I'm wondering if people are holding back. But REVIEW either way. 


	10. Sirius, You're Ruining the Moment!

A/N: I AM SO SORRY! Oh my God. I didn't MEAN for it to take this long! I hope I didn't loose any readers.... But this chapter is my longest one, so does that make up for it? To those of you who asked about the owl: I basically just included him in the story because I needed a way for the Marauders and Kam to see the paper. We'll see him later, though. And I've also received questions as to why Kamara kept her secret.... a secret... because it wasn't that bad.... well, you'll find out why this chapter, and besides, there's a little more to the secret.... 

I REACHED A HUNDRED REVIEWS!!!!!!! WA HOO!!!!!!! Wow. I am just SO ecstatic! This is so amazing! THANK YOU ALL!!!! 

Oh yes. About the "project" that McGonagall assigns (you'll find out). I'm terribly sorry. I just needed a project, and I figured, "What the heck? Might as well go with this idea. No biggie." Yeah, well, that "project" is what happens when I listen to echo. (YOU HEAR THAT, ECHO?! YOUR FAULT!) So the "project" is very stupid, but I think you can ignore the stupidness of it and just go with the flow, right? (echo: you DO know that "stupidness" isn't a word, don't you?) Stuff it, echo. So basically, anything that has to do with that "project" is utter crap, and I am deeply embarrassed even to include it in here. Sorry. And the rhyme is also incredibly ridiculous. 

Oh yeah. And if you find any mistakes, blame Snowlily, she's my beta-reader (I have a beta!). Everyone go read her stuff! 

Disclaimer: JKR is a genius, goddess, supreme ruler, etc. and I am not and never will be. 

Dedications: Everyone who has been mentioned before, now including **Herminzy**! Love ya, girl! 

Thank You: 

****

Mars Ultor: I know! I am such a horrible person! Please, please, please forgive me! **Mithua: **REALLY?! COOL! I've ALWAYS wanted to kick ass! *does jig* **Rachel Hunt: **Yeah, I thought the "Kids today" thing was cute too, esp. coming from Sirius. Thank you so much for your reviews! **mati: **I hope you like this chapter! **Diana Cho: **Well, you'll find out more about her aunt and uncle this chapter, but I don't think I'll be able to get a chapter of her and them at home. Sorry. I can't see how it'd fit. I hope you're satisfied with the info I give you! **Atropus: **Yes, I know. Over a month. I am ashamed. I do hope this chapter makes up for it. **Indus: **Well, now you'll see what. I hope you like! **Silvercry**: *smiles* Yes, they'll fall in love... _eventually_. *insert evil laughter* Actually, they--- no, don't want to give it away! btw, I noticed that you reviewed EVERYTHING I put up... THANK YOU!!! **Rhiannon Greenleaf**: Well, if you insist. Very glad to hear you love it. And all your reviews made me very happy! **LoPotter**: Thank you SO much for the enthusiastic nine reviews! You were my hundreth reviewer! Gosh golly, I just feel so durn special! **Malleana**: thanks for reviewing! glad you enjoyed it! **Livin' Large**: *looks down from her cloud on Mt. Olympus* You have the short term memory too? Poor us. Thank you for reviewing! But who has the better fic? I'd love to read the other fic. **bluemeanies**: Yes, people have been telling me I should take out those pesky little author's notes. I try not to include them, but... well, other authors do it too! Yeah, that's my pathetic excuse. Anyway, I'll try a bit harder. **Fainting Maid: **Thank you for the lovely review! I've become a Kam Fan too.... I like her... **RaliNeoBlade**: I believe EVERYONE should be obsessed with Remus. He's definitely good enough. But you'll find there's more to Kam's secret this chapter... **Switch**: You are SO sweet! Oh my sweet sugar! 'Treasure to the writing world'.... thank you SO much! Gosh! I just feel so.. so... happy! **Torquemada**: Hey! A review! Yes, Kam's pain. Poor Kam. And now we find out more pain in this chapter... Poor, poor Kam.... **Moonrose**: You sweet person! You people are too kind, really. And your email was in your bio. Thank you for reviewing! **Erimentha**: Well, you just pin-pointed my plot for Kam's secret.... now, for the second part.... Ah yes. The insulting mirror. When I do my l/j fic, I think I might have to use that one. **Fyre Eye**: Sanity. EWWW!!! Anywho, thank you millions for reviewing! And I'm just ecstatic that you like this.... **Reya**: Yeah, I liked the toast thing too. Sirius is my other favorite. Next to James. I love to toy with them, make girls hit them and stuff. **cquill13**: Like I said, part 2 of Kam's Secret is in this chapter. *evil laugh* and it's rather ironic that you mention--- no, wait, that's giving it away. *more evil laughter* And yeah, I've decided to include the owl in later chapters. Reine won't be happy, but she'll live, and if she doesn't, then who cares? (I'm KIDDING, Reine! We love you, girl, you know that.) **Beth: **Wow is good? Tell Yenny congrats! **Reine**: Yes, your thinking is messed up, and the communist penguins like to play mind games, using you as a test subject. Didn't you know? And Reine, dearest, the owl will be in this chapter too. *sinister cackle* **Snowlily**: Why would someone flame me? Um... because they didn't like it? Because they think it needs flavor? Because they don't know that you're my friend and they're totally oblivious as to how violent you can get when defending your friends? I feel so protected with you around. =O)

****

EVERYONE IS IN THEIR SIXTH YEAR! 

I changed it. Pretend I never said anything about fifth year. Along with Professor Sinistra. I realized that Sinistra was the Astronomy Professor or something, so she's now Professor Ominia here. She's mentioned. She's the Potions Professor. 

~*~

__

Chapter Ten

~*~

Days passed slowly and painfully, and it had been nearly two months since that fateful article. Kamara completely avoided contact from the marauders at all costs, and they were lucky to glimpse the hem of her robes in the Common Room the way things were now. Remus vaguely wondered if things were going to be like this for the rest of the year. _It's barely even April_, he thought ruefully. 

And the worst part was: No one could do anything about it. 

Remus wanted more than anything to be there for Kamara, to comfort her, to let her know that it was all okay; but she wasn't letting anyone near her. She was even more isolated now than when the Marauders had first noticed her. 

Remus sighed as he slid into his seat in Transfiguration, watching Kamara take a seat in the very back, on an unoccupied table. Remus turned to look at James, who was sitting beside him, and they shared a defeated look. 

"Today we will start a special project, reserved for fifth year students only," began Professor McGonagall as she walked into the classroom. "I will pair you up in groups of threes and you will have the entire week to complete the assignment." The class looked at each other, intrigued. Professor McGonagall seemed satisfied with this response and continued. "You will take the box I give you and you will transform it into a certain entity. Not just any entity, mind you--- I will tell you which specific article. Rather, I will give you clues as to which article you will be transfiguring the box into, and you will have to figure out what it should be. You, along with completing this, will also have to write a three-foot parchment essay on your hypothesis, method, predictions and outcome. This project will be a large part of your grade this term and should be approached _in all seriousness_," she directed the last comment to James and Sirius. The rest of the class was staring at McGonagall with irked expressions. Remus, however, was praying that Kamara would be in his group. _She'd have to talk to me if we were paired together,_ he thought hopefully. He looked over at Kamara, who was staring at McGonagall with a neutral expression. Then the professor began again.

"Now, for the pairs. Wood, Brown, and Pettigrew, you three in one group." Peter groaned at the thought of having to work with Magenta Brown (a giggly girl who had the most annoying mannerisms). "Potter, Black, Jemison together. Lupin, Evans, and Dayton, you three together. And---" Remus stopped listening after his group had been announced. _Lupin, Evans, and Dayton. Lupin, Evans, and Dayton. Kamara! _Remus glanced at her again. She sat with her eyes squeezed shut, lips pressed firmly together. Lily went over and plopped herself next to Kamara, eyeing her warily and looking at Remus for help. He made his way over to the table and took a seat on the other side of Kamara. 

~*~

An awkward silence passed, in which Remus stared intently at Kamara (who had now opened her eyes, but was staring determinedly at the chalkboard) and Lily glanced nervously between the two. Professor McGonagall broke the horrible tension block as she approached their table and dropped a piece of parchment on it. Grateful for the distraction, Lily scooped it up and read it aloud for Remus and Kamara to hear. 

"_To capture a memory, to keep it safe_

as to recall it later, with a steadier face

one would possess a brain such as this. 

For one with a probing nature, a lock would suffice

to keep this treasure hidden from prying noses

but a counsel to the owner: give your thoughts in small doses." 

Lily looked up from the parchment to Professor McGonagall (who was busy reprimanding James and Sirius for setting off a firework, reducing Lacey Jemison's hair to ashes; the poor girl was sent to Madame Pomfrey) and sent her a menacing glare. 

"How does she expect us to figure this out? This is bloody Transfiguration Class, not Give-The-Poor-Children-A-Difficult-Puzzle-And-Tell-Them-It's-Half-Of-Their-Grade Class!" She sighed. "Either of you have an idea as to what this thing might be?" she asked them sulkily, not really expecting much of an answer from either classmate. Remus tore his eyes away from Kamara and shook his head slowly at Lily. 

"It's a magical object, we know that for sure, but that hardly narrows it down." Relieved to have gotten a bit of life from Remus, Lily gave him a small smile. 

"You know, a camera might work.... It captures memories, doesn't it? But that wouldn't fit with the rest of the riddle.... Why would someone want to lockup a picture? Unless of course that picture was of James, no one wants to look at him anyway...." Remus gave a weak chuckle at Lily's musings. "What do you think, Kamara?" she tried. 

Kamara didn't look away from the chalkboard. "I think," she began slowly, "that it could perhaps be a pensieve." Remus and Lily stared at her once more. Remus, surprised that she spoke, and Lily, wondering what on earth a pensieve was. 

"And what, exactly, is a pensieve?" Kamara turned her head to look at Lily. 

"A pensieve is something that keeps your thoughts for you, when you feel that your mind is too cluttered to handle everything at once. It looks rather like a cauldron, but there's a permanent silver liquid inside that keeps your recollections." Lily nodded slowly. 

"I still don't understand, though. It says that a lock would suffice if you wanted to keep your memory hidden from anyone else. Why would you want to keep a memory a secret?" At this, Kamara shifted her gaze from Lily to Remus, looking him straight in the eyes. 

"Because some memories are best left alone." 

~*~

Lily Evans was a nice girl. Prefect, top of _most _of her classes (drat that Potter), a sweet smile to give her an innocent look.... A little testy at times, and known to have mood swings like the devil, and of course there were those infamous prank wars with James Potter (tune in every Saturday night in the Gryffindor Common Room for some real entertainment)--- but all in all, she was a good person, and a good friend. 

So, typically, a smart girl like Lily could hardly fail to notice the rather obvious state of sorrow that her fellow roommate was in. Now, Lily had been hearing rumors; some plausible, some a little suspicious, others downright ridiculous. But given the fact that they were just that, rumors, Lily had been on the skeptical side (after all, the sources _were_ mostly Malfoy and Magenta) but now that she had really seen Kamara, she was starting to wonder. She'd heard things about a newspaper; something about a mystery; a few times the word "parents" had been whispered; once, she'd heard about a suspiciously white owl; and then there were all sorts of other odd things--- Kamara was the descendant of Merlin, her parents had gotten in trouble for raising dragons, etc. 

Now Lily, being the sensible girl that she is, knew the difference between what was obviously a far-fetched tale and a reasonable fact. She wasn't made a prefect for nothing, you know. And even though Lily and Kamara weren't especially close, Kamara had never done anything to vex Lily, and she had even given Lily an idea for a revenge prank on Potter once. So it really didn't seem fair that a kind, caring person like Kamara should have to be so out-of-sorts. And as a prefect, it was part of Lily's duty to make sure that justice came to everyone at Hogwarts, and therefore Lily would need to know just was bothering Kamara, who was a fellow prefect, and what she would need to help.

But the thing was, Lily couldn't be sure of anything until she heard it from Kamara. 

Or at least one of Kamara's best friends. 

~*~

James Potter hated Lily Evans. She was short, annoying, loud, had a tendency to start prank wars with James, and got better grades than he did in Charms and Runes. With this said, it's obvious why James thought her to be positively detestable. 

So it's understandable, then, the irritation that James felt when this Evans creature approached our dear James and his friends in the Gryffindor Common Room, wanting to know things that she had no business knowing. 

"Look, Potter, we may not be friends and all that, and I may not know Kamara like you four do, but she's my friend, and something's wrong with her, and I'm not about to let that slip by!" 

__

What is her problem, anyway?

"Ya know what your problem is, Evans?" James started. "You just don't know when to quit! You've barely talked to Kamara for six bloody years and all of a sudden--- _Poof! _You're acting like she's your long lost sister!" 

"I have too talked to Kamara! She's the one that gave me the idea for the chicken prank in fourth year!" _So that's where Lily got that spell from... I'll have to bring that up with Kamara some time... She owes me... I was plucking feathers for a week..... _"But that's not even the point."

"Oh, you have a point?" James retorted sarcastically, crossing his arms. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Remus, Sirius and Peter watching the scene with amusement. Lily glared.

"Yes, I have a point," she replied through clenched teeth. "And that point is that no matter how close or not me and Kamara are, she's my friend, my fellow prefect---"

"I'm her fellow prefect too," James muttered, but Lily continued as if she hadn't heard him.

"---and she's obviously hurting right now! And since you four don't seem to be making much progress in getting her to talk, I thought I'd offer my hand in helping in exchange for any information on her problem." 

"So let me get this straight," James began, gesturing with one hand while keeping his other arm tucked in. "You notice Kamara acting all depressed and you feel sorry for her, so you decide you want to help her. The problem you face is not knowing what exactly she needs help with. So you come to her _real_ friends to get secrets so that you can go off and play the hero, because---"

"Heroine." James glared at Peter before turning back to Lily.

"Fine, so you can go off and play the _heroine_, because you're just that kind of goody-goody, when it's _none of your business _to begin with!" Lily gave James a hard, determined look. 

"She is my friend, James, and that makes it my business." James was slightly surprised at the usage of his first name, but Lily had said it as though it were a swear. "I'm going to help her whether you like it or not, but if you told me what was wrong, it could be beneficial for all of us." Lily cocked her head and said in a smug sort-of voice: "You ever think that maybe she'd like a _girl_ to talk to instead of four guys with rampaging hormones and a mind for pranks?" James glared hard at Lily through his slitted eyes, wishing hard that he could make her melt and evaporate. The little glare war wasn't broken until Remus came up to Lily and said:

"If you're sure you can get her to talk to you... we'll tell you what's wrong. But you have to _promise_---," he looked her straight in the eye, "---promise that you won't tell _anyone_ else. Kamara obviously wants this kept quiet, and no matter how many people know right now, it's not right to go around blabbing to the whole world like _some _people." James was sure Remus was referring to Malfoy and Magenta. 

"I promise," Lily said confidently. Remus nodded and sighed, then walked away and gazed pensively into the fire for a few moments before telling Lily Kamara's story. 

~*~

"Wow," was all Lily could say after Remus had divulged Kamara's drab past. Lily looked shocked, sorrowed, and thoughtful at once. Remus decided that she really hadn't thought Kamara's problem would be this serious. James, who had been sitting huffily beside Sirius while Remus told Lily everything, stood up. 

"Well, I hope you're happy, you nosy little know-it-all," he spat moodily. "And now that you know about Kamara, I'm just sure you have a most _wonderful _plan to help her, because you really are that smart." His tone was biting and sarcastic, like it usually was when he was addressing Lily. Lily blinked, coming out of her daze, and looked solemnly at James. Then, with a determined tone, she said: 

"As a matter of fact, I do."

~*~

Kamara looked sulkily out of the window in her dorm, staring down at the Hogwarts grounds. It was gray and rainy and dreary-looking, and Kamara wished it wasn't, because it reminded her of so many things, and she wished that a few certain people would have the sun to go and play under instead of sitting down in the Common Room and pondering her past. 

It wasn't that she didn't like them anymore. No, far from it. She just didn't want to get hurt again. Loss is the most painful thing in the world to go through, and it seemed that the people Kamara cared about the most were ill fated. 

__

Why? Why does it always_ happen to me? I'm not special! Why do these things always happen to me? Lose Mum. Lose Dad. Land with Seth and Leiko. Happy, happy, joy, joy. Seth and Leiko are such wonderful people, after all. Positively lovely human beings. _

She couldn't bear to lose her friends. She could deal with the pain of watching them have fun without her, watching them forget about her, but there was no way she'd be able to live through their deaths. 

__

So I'll push them away and be alone. 

What a happy plan. 

~*~

Meanwhile, James was still marveling over _Lily's _plan. It was surprisingly clever, even for Lily. And that was saying something, because heaven knows that James Potter only had one respectful thought towards Lily Evans about once every blue moon. 

Lily and Remus were the main people in the plan (James had to admit, it was a bit of luck that those two would end up being Kamara's Transfiguration partners). Lily had told them about the pensieve. She said that she'd gone and done some background reading on it (what a Lily-thing to do, James had thought) and found that a pensieve would keep your memories in it's liquid substance, almost like a photo album, so that when you needed to refer to them, you could go back to the pensieve and summon them. They also came in handy when you would happen to be frazzled and hassled, and felt like your mind just had too many things to think about. It would be the perfect gift for Kamara. This way, Kamara would put whatever memory was troubling her into the pensieve, and she'd never have to look at it again. Then everything would be fine again, and they could go back to being sixteen-year-olds. 

Except for the one little problem they faced: In order to give the pensieve to Kamara, they needed to be in possession of one. Pensieves did _not _come cheap, stated Lily firmly. "...And I personally don't see how McGonagall expects us to transfigure a box into a pensieve, because they aren't easy to make, or to acquire, and we're only sixth years, anyway! I suppose we have a slight chance of doing the transfiguration correctly if it's a joint effort, and I suppose that's why McGonagall put us into groups, because this way---" James had stopped listening to Lily by then and began to think of how they could get a pensieve. It was true that Lily, Remus and Kamara were going to (try to) transfigure one, but they weren't allowed to keep that. Besides, with Lily's transfiguration skills being what they were (which wasn't something altogether very impressive, James thought smugly; for though Lily bested him in Charms and Runes, he had her in Transfiguration and Care of Magical Creatures), it was very probable that the pensieve _she_ would help with wouldn't be very stable. So the only way James could see anything happening was if he would transfigure something into a pensieve.... 

Lily quickly squashed this idea, however. 

"Even if you and Sirius and Remus are capable of transfiguring something into a pensieve, James, there's more to it than just pointing your wand and muttering a spell. We're going to need ground-up leaves from a Jiteruba plant on the fourth Friday of the month (which would be this Friday, in case you four are _completely_ dull) at precisely four-twenty-one in the morning---not a second before or after---and mix it with water from the lake on that following Saturday in a room with the temperature somewhere between thirty and forty degrees Fahrenheit. Following that, there's a long spell that must be cast over the box once we've poured the Jiteruba water into it. After that, we have to wait precisely---" 

At this point, James begun to tune Lily out again, grumbling to himself. Then Sirius (of all people) announced that all of this thinking was giving him a frightful headache and that he needed to cause some mischief to relieve himself, and that the best they could do at present would be to keep an eye on Kamara and continue trying to break into her. Lily promised that she would be doing more research and thinking of more possibilities as the four Marauders exited the portrait hole (on their way to visit their good old friend Mrs. Norris). 

One thing was for sure, though. 

James didn't envy Lily and Remus and Kamara for their Transfiguration project one bit. 

~*~

"All right, now, I've got everything ready, we just have to do the spell and then wait until tomorrow at midnight and it should be a pensieve by then! Unless, of course, McGonagall didn't mean for the box to be a pensieve... oh my gosh... what if we figured wrong? What if we did all this work for nothing? What if the object really _is_ supposed to be a camera?!"

"Lily, calm! It's okay! I'm _sure_ it's a pensieve!" Remus soothed. Lily quieted slightly, but was still mumbling under her breath. Kamara, on the other hand, was completely silent (not that Remus was incredibly surprised). She was sitting at a table in the Common Room, staring at a book about pensieves opened to her on the table. She seemed so lost in her own mind, just like she had been for the last few months... ever since that article.... She never smiled. Never. She sat in attention at classes and took notes studiously, but she didn't speak with anyone unless she had to, and then it was only about assignments and the like. Remus had to hand it to Lily, though--- she really was doing her best to reach out to Kamara. She was a great person to be friends with, talented and kind (most of the time).

So Lily wasn't the snapdragon James thought she was. 

If Kamara wasn't in her current state, she and Remus would be conspiring on how to get them together. 

~*~

"And full credit marks to Miss Dayton, Mr. Lupin, and Miss Evans, for this impeccable pensieve," McGonagall said approvingly, even gracing the group with a rare, tight-lipped smile. Lily beamed proudly (she _had _done most of the work, anyway), Remus managed a small smile, and Kamara sat expressionless. Remus turned to look at her and Kamara was struck by all the hurt in his eyes_. Is that because of me?_

She looked away. She couldn't bear seeing his eyes like that, and knowing that it was probably her fault for making him suffer. 

__

It's better he suffer than die, she told herself sternly. 

Kamara didn't look at Remus the entire lesson. 

But she thought of him the whole time. 

~*~

Lily was frustrated, exasperated, aggravated, and fed up. She hadn't been able to get Kamara to talk and she couldn't think of anything that would help. She had abandoned the pensieve idea, it was hopeless. Lily'd had to beg Professor Ominia for her last Jiteruba plant, and she'd had to stay after class for the entire week cleaning up the dungeons to make up for it. Without the Jiteruba plant, she couldn't make a pensieve. Besides, she wasn't very fond of Professor Ominia, either. And she was willing to bet that Kamara might not even accept the pensieve, or they might not even get a chance to give it to her. 

Lily was quite fed up indeed. 

But a distraction worth mentioning was spying Remus from one of the windows in the Gryffindor Common Room following a suspiciously white owl to the lake....

~*~

Remus had just been walking innocently on his way to the library. He was miserably strolling down a deserted corridor (it was early on a Saturday morning; everyone was either sleeping in, or.... no, every normal person in the wizarding world was sleeping in), thinking of how desperate the Kamara situation was, when he stumbled (literally) across a mistrustfully white owl. 

The exact same owl that had delivered The Paper. 

Picking himself up, Remus eyed the owl warily and walked cautiously towards it, half because he didn't want to scare it off and half because he was scared of it, and was about to reach his hand out to it when it looked up at him. 

The owl locked it's wise blue eyes with Remus', almost like a human would. No, _just_ like a human would. In fact, that owl seemed more human than Sirius did at times (though that wasn't exactly hard to believe, as Sirius might not have been completely human to begin with). Just as Remus was about to ask the owl what it's name was, the little bugger flew up, and began speeding down the hallway. Well, that left Remus with only one option. 

__

That is one fast_ owl_, Remus thought as he set off after it. 

~*~

Kamara looked up distractedly as she heard something in the tree she was leaned against. Her breath caught in her throat. 

It was That Owl. The same one that had shown her The Paper. 

She stared up at it, too stunned to do anything else, until she heard movement behind her. Spinning around, her eyes fell on a huffing Remus. She swallowed nervously and looked around for an escape, a distraction, an excuse, or anything that would help her get out of this.... 

There wasn't anything. It was too early on a Saturday morning (barely five o'clock). 

"Kamara?" Remus said hoarsely. 

~*~

"James! Sirius! Peter! Wake up! Wake up right now! Guys!" Lily stomped around the sixth year boy's dormitory, shouting at them, spilling water on them, try anything to make them get up, but it was no use. It was as though their minds concentrated on the fact that it was a Saturday, and there was no way they were going to get up without a very good reason. 

Either that or they were playing dead to irk Lily. 

Either choice was extremely probable. 

"Guys! C'mon! This isn't funny! This is really important!" Lily threw her hands in the air in exasperation. Suddenly, struck with a sudden idea, she went up to Sirius' bed. "Sirius, you're failing Transfiguration." 

He didn't stir. 

Lily blinked and sucked on the inside of her cheeks in irritation. This would be harder than she anticipated. 

"They're canceling Quidditch season." Sirius bolted.

"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL ARE THEY DOING THAT FOR?! THE IDIOTS! THE MORONS! THE---" Lily, who had been standing right next to Sirius as he began yelling, flew back a few feet when he woke. Normally, she would've hexed him senseless, but he'd managed to get James and Peter up as well with all his shouting. 

"Sirius, what on earth--- Lily?! What are you doing here, this is the boy's---"

"Evans! What do you think you're doing? You're not allowed in here! Who do you think you---" 

"GUYS! Kamara and Remus are down by the lake talking at this very moment! Are you interested or not?!" 

That remark was met by utter silence, which was followed closely by a stampede of three pairs of male-smelling feet and some painful cries from Lily. 

"Wait a minute!" Lily called from her heap on the floor. "Just wait one bloody minute! Don't go out there! Don't you see?! This is the perfect opportunity! Just watch from the window!" 

"....But... isn't that... erm... spying?" Peter asked attentively. Lily gave him a Look. 

"Well, fine. Go back to bed. You're right. It is spying. And spying is certainly not something _honorable _students with _pristine_ reputations such as yourselves would ever consider doing. And besides, this is _only_ Kamara, after all, and it's not as though she's _going_ through anything right now, and it's not like we're even her _friends_ or anything---"

"All right, Evans, we get it!" And the four crowded around the window. 

~*~

Kamara's voice was tight. "Remus." 

"Kamara, we need to talk." Kamara looked away from him and out towards the trees beyond the lake. 

"There's nothing to talk about." Remus swallowed hesitantly. This wasn't going to be easy, he could see that now. He sighed. It wasn't really as though he had ever expected it to be. 

"Kamara, we know about your parents. James, Sirius, Peter, Lily and me. We know." Kamara said nothing, and Remus was grateful that she didn't ask how or why Lily knew. Remus paused. "Kamara, why didn't you tell us?" he asked, his voice not masking the desperation and hurt that he felt. 

"Because I didn't want your pity, and I didn't want to be reminded," Kamara told him after a while. Her voice was defeated and weak. Remus stared at her. 

"But Kam, you really should have told us.... We were--- we _are_ your best friends.... We trusted you..._ I _trusted you.... It hurts that you didn't trust us." Kamara's eyes widened. 

"Remus, that's not it at all! I--- God, Remus! What was I supposed to do? Everyone I've ever loved has died! I couldn't bear to lose you too! I loved you all, and it would've been so typical for everything to happen! I would hate myself!" 

"Kamara.... No, Kamara, please, nothing will happen to us, we're fine! We'll---"

"You don't know that for sure, Remus! Voldemort could swoop down on any of you whenever he pleased and I'd lose someone again!" 

"Kamara, if that would happen, then there would be nothing you could do to stop it!" Remus took a deep breath. There was so much more to Kamara than he had thought. "Don't you see? You're only hurting yourself by pushing us away! Kamara, if something would happen, there would be no way you could stop it, it would be in no way your fault, and wouldn't you have wanted to create some good memories to turn to and remember the people you've lost by?" Kamara shook her head sadly. 

"You don't understand, Remus. I don't want to do it anymore. I don't want to be this person anymore! Everything is messed up, and I don't know where I'm going, or what's happening, and everything is spinning so fast... I just want it all to go away. I want for everything to disappear and leave me be. I don't want this life anymore. The few memories that I have haunt me like a persistent ghost, and I can't think of anything but them... and that night." Kamara faltered there, and a far-away look came into her eyes. She was lost in the memory of that night. She squeezed her eyes shut tightly and put her hands to her temples in a fruitless effort to make the horrid mental images go away. "I don't want to go through that again, Remus, and I know that's what would happen if I lost any of you," she whispered when she'd opened her eyes. 

"Kamara... please.... don't do this to yourself.... You have to remember the good times...." Anger passed over her features.

"That's just it, Remus! I want my memories back! I want the memories I'll never have! You have no idea what it's like for me! I try to remember them, the good times that we must've had, the laughs and the smiles, but all I ever see, the only thing my mind ever lets me hear, are the screams that night, and the shouts and the threats and the whispers and--- and that laugh. And I---I remember seeing... seeing them... lying there... and then the laugh... and..."

Remus unconsciously inched closer to Kamara. "Kam, why didn't you tell us?" he asked, his voice barely a whisper. Kamara squeezed her eyes shut once more and swallowed before replying. 

"I didn't want to be friends with you. I didn't want to know people and get... attached to them. I already lost my parents, Remus, and that hurt so much. I knew you'd do something like this, I knew it!" She looked away from him, towards the window. "I knew you'd pity me," she continued in a softer voice. "I don't want pity, Remus. That's why I resisted you all so much in the beginning, you remember. I still don't know why I let everything last this long. I should never have let things get this way. I know how it'll end. You'll leave me. Or something will happen to you. And then I'll get hurt again. I don't need that. Don't you see, Remus? This entire idea of love and friendship... it only ends in pain."

Remus couldn't believe what he was hearing. Was this really Kamara, cheerful and lovely and helpful? "You need friends, Kamara! You can't go through life without loving! You have friends, and you need them. We need you...." Kamara turned her head back towards him. 

"Stop it. Just stop it, Remus. Haven't you been listening? I gave love a chance, and look what it's done for me. My parents are dead. The only people I'd ever had to depend on, dead, ripped from my life forever. Then I come here, hoping to forget, and I do, I almost do, when I finally have friends. And then you find out about everything, and now you stand there, wanting to talk to me about it, wanting me to say how I feel about everything." Hurt was chiseled into her features, and her eyes poured out strife. "I'll tell you how I feel. In the problem of Life, it's a known fact that Love equals Pain. _That's_ how I feel." 

The look on her face made Remus' heart freeze. There were tears in her eyes, lots of tears, and she held them in. Her eyes themselves glared at him, telling him everything. How she felt. Her sorrow. Her desire for love. Her loss. Her memories. That bitter agony that she'd kept inside her all these years.... 

Her expression was solemn, but it was taking all of her self-control to keep it that way. Remus' eyes widened with the revelation that stood in front of him. He thought he had known her. At least known her better than the other three. He had no idea... no one did. They had only glimpsed at the real Kamara Dayton. And now that Remus was seeing her in full, he wasn't so sure he wanted to anymore. She looked so broken, so scared, so un-Kam like. At the moment, the only thing Remus wanted to do was take her in his arms and hold her. And the words she had just spat out... _I can't believe she thinks that! How could I have been so stupid? How could I have just let this all fly past me? _

He closed the distance between him and Kamara once more and put his arms around her, engulfing her in a hug. She struggled faintly, but he wouldn't let her go. She needed this. She needed to know that he wouldn't let her go. She stopped fighting him and let herself be pulled against him, not stopping the tears that were falling down her cheeks and soaking his robes. After a short while, Remus gently eased her off him, and stared straight into her eyes. 

Those beautiful eyes of hers, those deep blue eyes that seemed to say everything without making a sound. She was exhausted, he could see it. 

"How could you ever believe that, Kam?" he whispered, staring his eyes into hers. "How?" Kamara's shoulders sagged with fatigue. She didn't want to answer, he could see it, and he didn't care. "You know that it's not true now, don't you?" He looked into her eyes. "Don't you, Kam?" Kamara sighed. 

"Remus, there's... something else you should know." She looked away from him and took a few steps back. "Or something I might as well tell you." She took a deep breath. 

"Seth and Leiko Bradford are Death Eaters," Kamara said, her voice void of all emotion. She pointedly ignored Remus' wide eyes and shocked expression. "They... don't particularly like me." Kamara swallowed. "And... I... I also know that they took part in the... in the murder of my parents." Kamara swallowed. 

"I haven't had a lot of time to trust people, Remus. I haven't gotten used to civilized people trusting _me_. That's why it's hard for me to tell you this, even though you are one of my best friends, and even though I do trust you.... I've never liked to think about this, but I can't help it. It's always running through my head, every conversation, every memory, every stupid little thing...." 

Remus was stunned. This was not what he had anticipated. Kamara stood with her back to him, facing the lake once more. Her wavy black tresses hung loosely past her shoulders, and though he couldn't see her face, Remus could feel the anguish of more spiteful memories uncovering themselves. Remus stepped to her for the third time that night and held her in a comforting embrace. 

"You can't do this to yourself, Kamara," he whispered gently to her. "You can't lock all this up inside you. Please, please don't do this to yourself.... You have friends, Kam, and no matter how hard you try, you're not going to get rid of us. Sirius won't let you...." 

She smiled. He smiled. 

They smiled. 

~*~

Remus and Kamara walked slowly and silently up to the Common Room, both comfortable and smiling softly. Kamara, for one, was positively glowing with the serenity of it all. They entered the Common Room quietly, Remus in front of Kamara. He turned around suddenly, for he was going to ask her whether or not she thought they should wake up Lily, James, Sirius, and Peter, because they would certainly want to hug and welcome Kamara back as well, when their noses bumped together. 

A part of their faces touched. A part that was very, very close to the mouth. To the _lips_. 

They pulled back immediately, but didn't separate. For a few moments, they simply stared at each other. Then, with the smallest of smiles from Kamara, she leaned up slightly and caught Remus in a kiss, one far more blissful and tender than anything either of them had ever felt, and Kamara couldn't help thinking how right it seemed....

They stayed like that for a while. 

And Remus was thinking about how right it felt, too. 

~*~

Poor Remus and Kamara, though, had no idea that they had an audience. For in a corner untouched by the morning's light, Lily, James, Sirius, and Peter all huddled together, watching the scene. 

"Go Moony," Sirius muttered slyly, rooting for his friend. Peter flicked him in the head. 

"You're ruining the moment," he admonished. 

"They look good together," James observed. Peter smiled. 

"I think they make the perfect couple." 

"Well, we all saw it coming. Honestly, the way they were always drooling over each---" 

"Sirius, you're ruining the moment again." 

"Merlin, how long do you think they'll be at it?" 

"Dunno, Jamesie. But like I said before, go Moony!" 

"Sirius! _Not so loud!_" 

Lily, who had been silent through the entire thing, sighed contentedly and smiled broadly. 

"That is so sweet. It's so romantic... and so _sweet_..." James grinned mischievously and winked at his friends before swooping Lily up in his arms and kissing her comically on the lips, making a great deal of racket along the way by cause of Lily's rather violent protests and Sirius and Peter's laughter. 

This, of course, distracted Remus and Kamara, and they turned just in time to see Lily slap James hard before kissing him back. This made everyone laugh. But then there was Sirius....

Sirius began clapping enthusiastically, and said is a loud voice: "Go Prongs! And Moony, wow! Didn't think you had that much breath in you! And Kamara, you know, I've got to congratulate you, if I'd have known that you could kiss that good (and believe me, Birdie, it looked like you were doing a _wonderful _job), I would've hooked up with you before Remus here had the chance! I mean, that was, what? Four minutes? Five? Si---" Sirius broke off abruptly as Peter smacked him upside the head. 

"Sirius, dammit, you're spoiling the mood!" 

James and Lily has broken apart by this time, James gaping at Lily as though seeing her in a whole new light, and Lily, glaring hard at Sirius. Remus and Kamara had long since been sending him the Look of Death, and Sirius only took heed now and Kamara took out her wand. 

"Um, you know what? I think me and Petie boy are going to head down to the... uh... library! We just have the sudden impulse to read something! Come on, Pete, let's go fill our brains with intelligent... er... stuff!" And Peter rolled his eyes as Sirius dragged him hurriedly out of the Common Room.

Remus could've sworn he heard Sirius mutter something about "young love", followed by something that sounded like a hit and a painful cry from Sirius. 

The four left in the Common Room smiled at each other. 

I think I'll let you dream up what happened next. 

~*~

Oh, but the story doesn't end there. No, not at all. Aren't you curious about our little feathered friend with the wise blue eyes? We were never properly acquainted with him to begin with. 

The suspiciously white owl that had been watching the entire scene in the Gryffindor Common Room by means of an open window swooped into another conveniently open window in one of the tallest towers on the Hogwarts castle, landing in Professor Dumbledore's chair---before changing into our Mr. Albus Dumbledore himself. 

Albus leaned back and smiled satisfyingly, sharing a knowing glance with Fawkes. Yes, young love indeed. 

~*~

A/N: um.... the end. Yes, that's right, the end of A REMUS STORY. I bet you're all celebrating now, aren't you? Oh, I'm SORRY, did I forget to mention that this was the last chapter before? Oops, silly me. Please review. There might even be an sequel someday. But not any time soon. 

Oh yes. And don't you dare flame me telling me that Dumbledore isn't an Animagus and Peter was being too nice. It's my fic and I can do what I want. Besides, Peter had to be somewhat cool in order to be accepted into the Marauder's group, because they wouldn't have put up with him if he was a whiny, sniveling little tag-along. And Dumbledore might be an Animagus, you never know! I doubt he is, but that's okay....

****

Reine: HA! *cackles evilly* I know, I'm horrible. I couldn't help it. 


End file.
